Tommyinnit Oneshots

Garbage Dogs

This is a 5+1, using a cool idea I saw on Reddit where Tommy's chat is raccoons. For conveniences' sake, Wilbur and Quackity aren't insane child manipulators in this one and Eret is King again or whatever.

TW: Swearing (heavy)

Tommy had been living alone for a while now. While he still visited his friends regularly, Puffy had wanted him to have a space of his own, where he wasn't dependent on anyone else. It had helped him immensely, although he did get lonely some nights when he would eat his dinner by the fire and all he could think about was how quiet the house was. He hated the quiet.

And then, suddenly, it wasn't so quiet anymore. A raccoon would scratch at his door, every evening, annoying him to no end until one night, he opened it with the intent of telling the stupid thing to fuck off. Surprisingly, the masked trash panda walked into his house, sat on the chair he had been sitting in, and started saying, over and over again, "Lonelyinnit." No matter what Tommy did, the raccoon wouldn't stop repeating it, and he wished for the door scratching once more.

Slowly, more and more raccoons accumulated, thankfully not all as annoying as the first one. Most still called him stupid names and took the liberty of giving him unhelpful advice, but some of them genuinely wanted to keep him company and would update him about things in the inner city of the SMP.

There were five times he unknowingly led people into believing he had gone insane, all because of the raccoons, and one moment where someone finally figured out what the hell he was talking about.

~1~

"Tommy!" The duck hybrid shouted from in front of the fountain, and the blond was quick to run toward his shorter friend and embrace him.

Quackity led him toward a place to chat where they would be shielded from the hot sun and this place turned out to be under a nice, shady tree. Tommy was sat in a wrought-iron chair, Quackity sitting across from him in an identical seat, a small table between them.

"So how've you been?" The Las Nevadas president was quick to ask, knowing Tommy had moved away from the action into a small house in the woods.

"You know, it's been a strange adjustment to the quiet but I think it's good. How about you, Mr. President? How has life in your fancy, fuckin' –what was it called?– Needle thing been?"

Quackity chuckled at his friend's antics, beginning to enthrall the blond with his stories of developing his new nation, and all the grand ideas he had for the future of Las Nevadas. He had Tommy's full interest and attention until the teen abruptly turned to the bushes, groaning dramatically. "Why are you here?"

"Who's there, Tommy?" Quackity asked, peering into the bushes to see if there was anything there, and finding nothing. Tommy ignored him, continuing to try and get whatever was in the bushes to go away. Quackity nervously picked up his lemonade, slowly sipping while he watched his friend get worked up at thin air.

After a minute of stern talking to the bush, Tommy turned around and was quick to apologize. "Sorry, it's those fuckin' trash pandas. Won't stop following me around."

"...Oh. Alrighty then. Uhm, Tommy... would you like some lemonade? It's awfully hot out, you should drink some." Tommy took his glass with a thank you, and Quackity made a mental note to tell Puffy about the event later.

~2~

"Welcome, welcome!" Tubbo said, ushering Tommy into his warm house and away from the frigid air of Snowchester. Tommy came in and Ranboo was quick to take his coat, to which Tommy responded, "You're too kind, Ranboob."

"It's... still Ranboo," The enderman hybrid said quietly, hanging up the coat and retrieving the tea from the kitchen to bring to the dining room, where Tubbo and Tommy were now sat facing each other, Ranboo going to sit next to his husband.