All But Rejected Mate (EDITED/COMPLETED)

Ch 23: Already Gone

Chapter 23: Already Gone (X's POV)

Drip... Beep... Drip... Beep...

The constant sound of machines is all the hope I have had for well over a month. The damage done that night had been more than one body should have lived through.

A claw puncture of the lung. Skin ripped from his body. Teeth marks mar battered flesh. All healed now. Your body looks whole again, but you still sleep. My other half. Will I ever feel whole again if you don't wake?

I sit and talk with my brother even though I doubt he can hear me. Maybe he can. He is the only one left who would listen. I fucked everything up.

Yes, I am Alpha now. Not just because Xand couldn't handle the pressure. I now hold the full power. Apollo Eclipse Pack all bow to me. They look to me as their leader. They look to me as their role model and I feel that pour through the Pack-link.

After their previous Alpha showed his true colors, the Pack looks for a better man. A true leader. As I look at what I have done with my life thus far, I fear I am not much better than him.

I pushed my mate into an agreement. There shouldn't be agreements like that between mates. Xand was right I should have been all in or rejected Lexi from the start. If I had maybe I wouldn't feel as shitty as I do now.

I tell Xand the story of what happened after Conner was slain and he was secured in the ICU.

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"Thank the Goddess Jax, you are here." I breathe out as I see my father's former Beta approach. It's been less than twenty-four hours since I left Elders Island, but each moment since I saw Xand laying at the bottom step has been filled with one horror after another. Xand's heart has stopped at least three times since then.

Jax pulls me in for a hug. I needed this. I needed someone who is family, someone to hold me together. Jordan is here with me, but he has been with V while I have been with Xand.

"I need to tell you something." Jax looks like he has aged 10 years in the last day.

"He'll be okay Jax. He has to be." I assure Jax, even though I'm not so sure myself.

"I've already talked to the doctors." He tells me, taking the seat I had been sitting in just before he arrived. "That's not why I'm here."

Confused I ask, "Okay... Then why are you here?"

"X you need to go home. I will stay with Xand."

He barely gets the words out before I start to argue. "I will not leave him."

Jax holds up his hand to stop me. "Lexi had her pup."

My whole world stopped. What is he talking about. It's too early. Lex still has a few weeks before she is due. I open my mouth and quickly close it. Not sure what to say because I know Jax would never joke about something like this.

"I will stay with him. Go be with your mate and your pup." His voice is stern. He challenges me to argue with him.

I turn from him to go make arrangements to head back to Elders Island.

"X," I turn back to Jax as I reach the end of the hall, "Don't repeat your father's mistakes."

I nod in response. Arrangements were made and I was in Elders' maternity ward within six hours of finding out my daughter was here.

Lexi was asleep when I entered her room. A see-through bassinet was set next to her bed. It looks as if she fell asleep watching our daughter sleep. The site is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. My heart swells. I feel tears fall to the scruff that has grown out on my chin.