The Princess and I

Chapter XXXII: Paradise at sea

Christina's recovery goes real slow and although I'd rather be with her all the time, my parents keep insisting on me partaking in the events of the courting season, once it is clear that Christina is out of danger. Not even Liam could convince them otherwise, due to which Liam and I both attend the necessary balls together once again. We realize that to halt society's gossip, we must return to the situation of Liam courting me. Only by being spotted in society together could we stop people pestering us about our relationship. So, I dance with Liam constantly, I make sure we are seen making a couple of strolls together and we engage very often in enticing conversation. And pretty soon we're back to being everybody's favourite couple of this year's courting season.

And I really enjoy hanging out with Liam again, since we get along quite well with one another. But for me there are no longer any romantic feelings attached to his presence anymore and I always long for the moment that I was able to return to Arlington Park. I still have my temporary residence at the moment in Arlington Park, since I am allowed to continue my care for Christina before and after any social events. To the public I am still friends with Christina after all and it speaks well for me, when I show this type of devotion to the public. After all, a devoting wife is all a man really needs.

So, weeks pass this way, while I am still floating from happiness. My love survived her stab wounds and is getting better every day. To me it seems more often than not that my life had been nothing more than a boring, grey existence before coming to Christina's birthday party. When I wake now and every time I think about Christina my whole body seems to tingle with excitement for another day to come. Every time I picture us being together, a mysterious smile plays on my lips. Nobody can touch me. Nobody can hurt me. I am resilient to almost anything, because of the love that exists between the two of us.

So, directly after another mandatory ball has ended, I rush back to Arlington Park to see how Christina is faring this day. The wound slowly heals properly, but Christina's mental state is not. She is constantly worried about me and Liam getting together again in her absence. I guess I would react the same way, when I was in her condition. She could not leave the house yet due to her injuries to see with her own eyes that nothing romantic happens between me and Liam at those dances.

So, while she was stuck at home her girlfriend left the house almost daily with her formal lover and Christina kept agonizing herself with thoughts about where I was, what I was doing and with whom I was doing those things. That couldn't be easy on her and I know that telling her does not change her mind about it. So, that's why I don't talk about the balls, unless she asks me to. And I do my utmost best to show her that I don't like going without her and I don't enjoy myself there at all without her being there with me.

On my days off I keep close to her at all times though. I accompany her on small strolls through the garden, where we enjoy ourselves between the cheerful looking and freshly smelling flowers. Every day she is able to walk a further distance, but it scares me how quickly she still tires. It more than once comes to pass that we have to sit down somewhere and she falls off to sleep with me guarding her.

We also try horse riding together a couple of times, but that is no success either. How elegantly she got on her horse before her accident, the more difficult it is for her now. And she's stubborn. God, she's so headstrong. She won't accept my help and doesn't give up, until she's on her mare's back although this costs her every bit of energy in her body. So, when we ride off, she is looking as white as snow and our rides are mostly short.

But for her the most difficult thing is to not be able to make out with me as we used to before she got stabbed. Although we never slept together due to my restriction, our kissing had been intense from time to time. And although it's not because of lack of trying, we are not able to make out for long nowadays, since it hurts her very badly. And though she tries to hide her pain, I can still see the flicker of pain in her eyes or the contortion of hurt in her face. I hate to see her ache like that, so I try to be patient. I am taught to be a forbearing woman after all and Christina knows that I am. I would never hold her responsible for showing too little kisses at the moment, because I know it grieves her as well. But still this lack of physical contact irritates Christina immensely. Partly, because she fears that this will drive me back into Liam's arms, who's not harmed and is able to show me the love that I need. How wrong she is. No one can satisfy my needs like she can, so that's one more reason for me to wait for her. Because when she will be able to make out with me again, it will be like Heaven has come down to this earth itself. But until then I will not push her too hard. One small kiss at a time will suffice for now.