The Marble Notebooks

Chapter 34

That night at dinner a lot of the guys made efforts to talk to my friends from school. It really warmed my heart to see everyone chatting and talking, even if some of the conversations were slow and awkward. Professor X, Tony, and Bruce were chatting amongst each other the whole dinner. I sat next to Bucky and had Storm sit across from us. If anyone was going to get along here, I made it a point for it to be Bucky and my best friend. Both of them tend to be a little standoffish so I carried most of the conversation between us but we made it work.

After dinner, we all helped clean up then sat in the living room as always to hang out and talk. Pietro got to Professor X and was asking him a bunch of random questions about Magneto and the X-men. He was really interested in everything he had to say. I've never seen Pietro focused on one thing for this long. Wanda sat next to him and acted like she didn't care but she was listening along the whole time. Storm and Nat began chatting about how it feels to be one of few girls among all the guys on the team. Kurt and Sam were joking around together. Alex stayed to himself, I'm sure Bucky's attitude made him feel even more uncomfortable than he already was. I could feel everything beginning to click. It made me feel like we could make this work. That we could come together and end the Brotherhood and the search for the tesseract.

Cap announced to us that we were all to be in the big gym at 8 A.M to begin training and learning about each others fighting tactics. Everyone quickly retreated to their rooms after that to get a good night's sleep. Bucky and I were getting ready in my room when someone knocked on my door. I answered it and it was Alex.

"Can we talk?" Alex asked me.

"Really?" Bucky said from my bed. "You did the same thing this morning and look what happened?"

"Please?" Alex ignored Bucky.

"Come in," I stepped to the side for Alex to walk in.

"Is he gonna be there?" Alex asked me pointing to Bucky.

"Yup," Bucky answered quickly.

"Yeah," I agreed with Bucky.

"Fine," Alex huffed. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for earlier again," He sighed. "And I wanted to let you know that I was going to come regardless of what happened. We've been fighting this battle for years and I would never let you guys go at it without me,"

"Thanks, Alex," I nodded. "I'm glad you came,"

"I'm not," Bucky mumbled and I sent him a mean look.

Alex ignored Bucky's comment. "It's weird, right? Being here," He asked. "I feel like we heard about these guys all over the place and now.. now you're like one of them," He said.

"I'm not one of them," I scoffed.

"Sure you are. They upgraded your suit, you have a massive room, hell you have fucking siblings here," He said shaking his head in disbelief. "You even joined in on the incest ring they got going on here," He joked and nodded to Bucky.

"Ha-Ha," Bucky said sarcastically.

"Well, it turned out these guys aren't as pompous and devious as we thought," I said to Alex.

"Right," He nodded smiling a bit. "Okay, I'll go," He sighed and glanced at Bucky. "Thanks for talking with me," He said and headed towards the door.

"Bye!" Bucky said as I shut the door behind Alex.

"You are bad," I smirked as I locked the door and came over to the bed.

"Whatever," Bucky shrugged.

Bucky turned on the T.V and we cuddled up to watch the movie. I couldn't stop thinking about Alex saying I was basically one of these guys. I always will consider myself an X-Man. It's been my destiny since I showed up at that school; to join the X-Men and be fighting side by side with them for life. Ever since I left the school months ago I have felt distant and disconnected from that side of me. But I sure didn't feel like an Avenger either. I felt like I was in this weird space where I didn't know where I belonged more. I have family on both sides now and couldn't see myself parting with either.

"What are you thinking about?" Bucky asked pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Nothing,"

"Liar, I can see it in your face. Talk," He said and pulled me on him to lay on his chest.

He ran his fingers up and down the long lightning scar that sprawled across my back.

"You're really amazing," I said lifting my head to look into his eyes,

"Random, but I'll take it," He leaned in to kiss me.

"I just hope you know that. That I appreciate everything you've dealt with for me,"

"I know you do," He said stroking my hair out of my face. "What are you really thinking about though?"

"When this all ends... what am I gonna do?" I said quietly.

"What do you mean? Aren't you going to be happy once we rid of this Brotherhood shit?" He asked.

"Of course, I can't wait," I assured him. "But where am I going to go after. This place isn't my home, the school is my home. I have students and classes... and people. People that raised me there," Bucky was silent. "But I can't leave Wanda, Pietro, and you. I just got you all,"

"I dunno," he said.

"I don't want to leave, but... it just wouldn't make sense for me to stay... would it?" I asked begging for any advice.

"Why are you even thinking about this right now?" He groaned. "Can't we just wait till it comes to that?"

"Yeah, yeah. I guess so," I laid my head back down on his chest feeling defeated.

We laid in silence for a few minutes before Bucky flipped us over so I was on my back and he was over me.

"I don't want you to go," He said and kissed me, "Or I don't want me to stay. I just don't want to be without you, okay?" He said and kissed me again hard.

"Really?" I asked smiling at him.

"Really." He comforted me. "Earlier when we were at the school, and you said let's go home, referring to here," Bucky began to explain. "It... It made me so happy to think that you considered this place with us home," He continued. "And I want to be in whatever home you want to be in, as long as you're there and I'm there, it's good with me,"

My smile reached from ear to ear listening to Bucky. He always knew exactly what to say when I was feeling stressed or nervous about something.

"Okay," I said and kissed him. "Deal. You're stuck with me now,"

"Wouldn't have it any other way."