unintended (Matt Bellamy Fan Fiction)

31. Safe

-Matt's POV-

So me and Raine stayed on the park, talking and bonding, as we do every night.

The topic suddenly goes back to that night we talked on the phone.

"I was so down that night. I was supposed to dial her number, tell her how much I love her then end my life. I had no reason to live. She's gone, I ruined the audition and didn't get us signed... It was hellish." I sighed, remembering that moment

"But then instead of 8, you pressed 7 and dialed the party line. And BAM we met slash talked." She said smiling.

"Which is what I'm very thankful for." I said smiling too.

"Do you still have suicidal thoughts in your mind?"

"Sometimes, like once every one month, but when we start writing and performing, it becomes less and less. I think I release those thoughts through our music. I still have those like once every few months."

"When was the last time you had one?"

"When you were with Chris, it was hurting me so much." I said.

She was quiet for a minute or two, looking down. Then she suddenly looks up and smiles.

"You know, I was supposed to give you something the moment we became official, but I guess I'll just give it to you tonight." Raine said, semi whispering.

"What is it? And did I do anything good to deserve it?" I asked smiling.

"Yes, you've done everything so great, you deserved it from the very start." she said and softly kissed me.

Weird thoughts are suddenly running around my head, does she mean she's giving her self to me tonight? Why so sudden? Girls are quite different I guess.

I am stopping myself from doing any more than kissing and hugging because I still don't know what she wants to give me.

Well, base on her words, it's pretty clear, but I might be mistaken, so no, not gonna do anything unless she gives another sign.

We kissed for a few minutes, I'm savoring every second of her soft, warm lips next to mine.

Then she pulls away.

"Sorry about that, Matt. Couldn't stop myself." She said giggling.

"Couldn't stop myself either. I told you, I could kiss you all night if you let me."

"Aww... That's so sweet... Anyways." She said and she pulls out something from her pocket.

Alright, it's clearly not the thing I was thinking about. Good thing I didn't make a move or else I might have freaked her out.

"This is a seashell and it's very important to me, it has been with me since the 6th grade. When I was drowning, and was saved, I woke up holding this seashell. And since then, I felt safe with it, I always carry it anywhere I go. And to always make sure you'll be safe, I'm giving it to you."

Wow, she saved me then and now, she's making sure I'm always safe, I feel so lucky.

"I... I don't know what to say..." I said, amazed.

"I know you might not believe these stuff because you're like into technology and stuff, maybe, but... Remembering you were planning on killing yourself back then, I just wanted to make sure that you'll be safe emotionally and of course physically." She said, putting it on my hand, smiling tearfully.

I gladly took it and hugged her, tightly.

"If ever you're feeling unsure about anything, always look at this. And you'll surely feel safe." She said.