SALVATORE #1: Loving the Prostitute

CHAPTER 39

I'm waiting for Luca in our own room. Wala na rin naman akong gagawin doon kaya nagpaalam na akong aalis na. Kanina pa wala si Luca. Ang tagal naman nilang mag-usap. Abot hanggang gabi.

I'm sitting on one of the chairs in the veranda. Kaharap ko ang magandang tanawin ng dagat. It calms me. The sound of the ocean waves and the view. I'm really obsessed with beaches.

Palagi akong dinadala ng lola ni Rylee sa mga dagat at doon ako nagsimulang maadik sa mga ganitong lugar.

Kapag babalikan ko ang mga panahon na kasama ko ang lola ni Rylee ay lagi akong napapaisip na ang layo ko na pala mula sa pinaggalingan ko. She brought me here and I don't know if I was happy or not. Maybe I was. Ngayong patay na siya at bumalik sa dati ang buhay ko.

I never missed my parents everytime I'm thinking. I really don't. Sinira niya pa lalo ang sira ko ng buhay. Sinira nila.

Kumuyom ang mga palad ko sa galit at pagkamuhi. Ngayon ko lang ulit ito naramdaman. Ang sobrang galit sa loob ko na halos ibulwak na lahat ng laman loob ko.

Sinubukan kong pakalmahin ang sarili pero hindi iyon naging madali sa'kin. Pilit kong pakalmahin ang sarili at binalik sa normal ang mabilis kong paghinga. Nanginginig na ang mga kamay ko dahil sa galit. I couldn't control myself anymore. Ito ang pinakaayaw ko kaya iniiwasan kong magalit ng husto.

My vision got blurry because of the tears started to pool my eyes. Pinigilan ko ang hikbi kong lumabas dahil ayaw ko nang umiyak. I don't want to cry anymore.

It's been years when I last cried. Pinikit ko ang mga mata ko at huminga ng kalmado. I did that again and again until I am fully calmed.

Pinunasan ko ang luha kong dumausdos sa pisngi ko kanina. I fixed my hair. Binalik ko ang dating postura para hindi mahalatang umiyak ako.

Tumayo ako at nagdesisyong matulog na lang. I don't want to think again. I'll better sleep. Kahit alam kong hindi rin magandang gawin 'yon lalo na at bumalik na naman ang mga iyon sa isip ko.

However, I still slept.

I was looking at the woman blankly. She's talking with the person who's taking care of me in this place. I couldn't call this home because it wasn't.

There are a lot of kids and women who wear something that covers their hair and their whole bodies. The woman keeps looking at me and smiles whenever I caught her staring at me.

I didn't smile back. Why is she smiling at me? Do I know her?

I couldn't take my eyes off her. I just stared at her and tried to think what's going on. Is she going to take me like the other kids here before?

"Mesha, come here," the covered with cloth woman said while smiling.

I didn't talk but obliged. I tilted my head to look at them looking at me. The other woman's eyes was twinkling and smiling wildly.

I looked at her without giving much emotion.

"She's so cute," the woman commented.

"She's one of the kids that most couples wanted to adopt," the woman covered with cloth said. She looked at me. "Mesha, from now on, she'll be the one to take care of you. Okay?"

She caressed my hair. I didn't answer. I kept my mouth shut.

After the talk, the woman took me to her place and tries to talk to me but I just listened to her and never talked back. She took me to her big and elegant house.

She took care of me patiently. She never forced me to talk. Months after, I was confused to the place where she took me in.

She was used to me for not talking.