MONTE COSTA SERIES #4: Estuary Of Love [BL]

Kabanata 10

Kabanata 10

LINUS couldn't help but let out a heavy breath while he's walking with Ivler. Katatapos lang nilang mamingwit ngunit sa dalawang oras nilang pananatili roon, naubos na't lahat ang alak nila ay wala pa rin silang nahuli.

"Maybe fishing is a talent?" he asked.

Mahinang tumawa ang nakapamulsa at nakayuko lamang na si Ivler. Mayamaya ay sinipa nito ang bato sa daanan saka humugot ng hininga. "That's for sure, mate."

Nagtama ang kanilang mga tingin, at nang siguro ay may parehong naalala, halos sabay silang umiwas ng tingin at muling bumuntonghininga.

Their conversation about having families and being straight kind of bothered him. Hindi niya alam kung bakit nasaktan siya sa simpleng usapang iyon, na kung tutuusin ay dapat namang maging normal na usapan lamang ng dalawang tao, lalo ng dalawang parehong lalake.

Somehow, he had second thoughts about being straight, as if Ivler's words made him question his sexuality. Isang bagay na hindi naman dapat mangyari. Isa pa, kung sakali mang totoong may kakaiba siyang nararamdaman, hindi si Ivler ang tipo ng lalakeng pipiliin ang taliwas na landas.

Whatever it is that's driving him nuts in the past few days because Ivler is keeping his distance, he knew it's going nowhere but a painful dead end in case he'd entertain it.

He looked at the clubhouse from a distance. Bakit naman kasi mas trip pa nilang maglakad kaysa gumamit ng golf cart?

He sighed. Instead of letting the awkwardness envelope them, Linus decided to think of a topic to kill time.

"'Di ba tennis ang sports ng daddy mo?"

Ivler looked at him then nodded. "Yeah. He's coaching the national tennis team but he used to play for their college football team. He just loved tennis even more."

"Huh. So why football? Bakit hindi tennis?" he asked.

Ngumisi ito at nagkamot ng sintido. "I keep getting that question but usually, I'd just say I like football more since mahusay rin naman daddy ko mag-football." Humugot ito ng malalim na hininga. "But I think I have a better answer than that."

He combed his hair to the back while still looking at Ivler. "What is it then?"

"I uh... guess we never really know what we'd actually want unless we give ourselves a chance to try something else, rather than just sticking with what's we're expected to love. I gave myself the liberty to explore until I found where I truly belong." Tumingin ito sa nga bituin bago nagpatuloy. "Football is something I actually hated back then but look where I am now? Life is crazy."

Napalunok sandali si Linus. If only that principle is applicable in everything, maybe people will have more freedom to express and might no longer lie even to themselves. Napangiti siya nang mapakla sa naisip.

"Was military your first choice?"

"Hmm?" Bumaling siya rito saka umiling. "Nah. Never in my wildest dream that I thought of pursuing my career but... surprisingly, I fell in love with it." Napangisi siya. "The irony. I used to tell myself I would be this and I would be that but here I am now, completely in love with my profession."

"Well, life is full of surprises. I guess we'll never really know what's in-store for us." Humikab ito nang marating nila ang clubhouse. "See you tomorrow, mate."

Nakipag-fist bump siya rito bago sila naghiwalay ng daan, ngunit nakakailang hakbang pa lamang sila palayo sa isa't isa ay muli siyang tinawag ni Ivler.

"Linus."

He took a halt and looked at Ivler's mesmerizing blue eyes, waiting for him to speak. Hindi niya mapaliwanag kung bakit parang bigla siyang kinabahan... at umasa kahit paano na sana, kaya siya tinawag ay dahil sasabihin nito kung ano ang mga salitang nais marinig ng kanyang puso.