Tainted Melodies (Ciudad de Escalante #5)

Phase 12

"Why you're giving me that?" tanong ni Alexius nang ilapit ko sa counter top ang itim na flashdrive. Katatapos niya lang maligo at nasa kusina kami ngayon.


Nagtatakang niya akong tiningnan habang naglalagay nang pampalasa sa sauce ng nilulutong lobster carbonara. It's our brunch today. I didn't expect him knows how to cook. Well, I guess he really is. He looked like he was independent for living alone in the house.


"You said it's yours so I'm giving it back to you," sambit ko at pumalumbaba sa counter habang pinapanood siya sa ginagawa.


Honestly, I was having second thoughts at first if I'd give the flash drive to him. Pero ngayon, buong-buo na ang desisyon ko. I recalled Vejah's message the last time we talked — a spirit possessed me when I said I didn't have it with me. My gut feelings said it's safer if it's in my hands, not only for her but for Alexius too.


And also, it's strange. For a woman like her who knew that someone holds something that can ruin you, you should be panicking but instead, she's calm and unbothered. Hindi niya ako pinilit man lang na hanapin ko pa at tingnan nang mabuti.


Hindi rin ako nagtangkang tingnan ang kung anong laman dahil sabi ni Alexius... isang pribadong bagay iyon.


"Aren't you worried with your fellow woman? I can use this against her," aniya habang hinahalo ang sauce. Pinilig ko ang aking ulo sa kanyang tanong. Sinikap kong hindi mabahala.


"Why would I become worried?" I asked back.


His jaw clenched. He stopped stirring the sauce and darkly fixated his intense gaze at me. Napahawak ako sa aking batok nang makitaan ang kanyang nalilitong ekspresyon.


"I'm not lying, Solaire. This has a recording of what we did," matigas niyang deklara kaya tumahimik ako saglit.


I sighed and gathered my composure to ask him directly. I shouldn't be one-sided, unlike what I did last time.


"Did you film it?" I asked firmly to clear my confusion about him.


Na sana kahit kaunti man lang sa naririnig ko at nababasa, may makuha akong kumpirmasyon na sa kanya mismo manggaling kung totoo ba.


He chuckled and placed both of his hands on the countertop.


"What do you think?"


I gasped. What do I really think?


"I guess, you didn't..." agap ko at tiningnan ang mga larawan niya na naka-display sa sala.


I think those pictures aren't exposed on social media. Hindi rin kuha mula sa photoshoot niya. Hindi rin promotion o connected sa trabaho. A raw and pure image. No filters, no manipulation, adjustments, and either enhancement.


Those pictures are very precious — a photograph of Alexius' everyday life.


He has pictures of him, who's drinking a beer while raising his middle finger, him who's inside his luxurious car while still lifting his middle finger, him who's puffing his vape while the city lights are in the background, and a candid picture of him playing the guitar.


They were taken by different people and different technology based on the quality and angles.


"How did you say so? If you're not aware, I had a sex scandal three years ago," he casually informed me like having a scandal was nothing. Walang bahid ng pagkailang o hiya pa.


"You didn't film it, did you?" pagbabalik kong tanong.


My explanation is not needed here. It's all about him letting himself get ruined quickly from false accusations. He might doesn't care about his reputation, image, or even his dignity... but witnessing his attempt to play with the chance of being alive using that fucking gun?


Who am I to ignore that?


The disturbing situation here is, it's either him or the girl who initiates to record it. I don't care if he had sex with other girls. Having sex isn't the problem; the record itself is.


"Tama ako 'di ba? You didn't filmed it," anunsyo ko sa kasiguraduhan habang nakatitig sa mga larawan niya.


Tumingin ako kay Alexius at tahimik lamang siyang nakatitig sa akin. I gulped and hesitated to speak what was on my mind again. I might be wrong, but I want him to know my thoughts...


"You're a model. You don't like taking photographs and videos yourself. You like other people to do it for you, so they can see something exactly the way you saw it," I said and stared at the pictures again.


"How can you be so sure about that?" naghahamon niyang tanong at humalukipkip.


I smiled.


"Everything isn't required to have a reason to be sure about it. The moment you didn't doubt for what you believe for, you're sure," I confidently stated.


Pero agad din napawi ang ngiti ko nang hindi siya umimik at tumawa lang ng mapakla.


"Think whatever you want to think, Solaire. I don't have time to prove or confirm anything."


I pouted a little from the coldness of his tone again. He's really Alexius. Of course, he'll not say it. He won't let you know everything. Just have a hard time collecting hints and putting them all together.


"Eat, so you can find a way how to go home," he spoke.


I watched him plating the carbonara and place the well seasoned lobster tail at the top. I fight the urge to drool. Mukhang masarap! Natatakam akong pinanood siya. He also prepared a strawberry shake for me. Hindi mabura ang ngiti ko nang makumpleto ang pagkain na para sa akin.


Ngunit kumunot ang aking noo nang ilapit niya sa akin ang plato pero hindi siya naghain ng kanya.


"Ikaw?" I asked. Hindi muna ako nagsimulang kumain. I don't want to eat alone.


"I'm on a diet," he uttered.


Bumagsak ang balikat ko. Ako lang mag-isa ang kakain ng mga ito?


Alexius removed all the used kitchen tools and put them in the sink. Pinunasan din niya ang mga dumi sa counter at tumalikod sa akin para buksan ang faucet sa lababo. He started to washed the tools one by one.


"Eat and stop staring, Solaire."


I blinked. Nakatalikod siya. How did he know I'm staring? Bumalik ang tingin ko sa carbonara. May side dishes din siyang inihanda kanina. I'm really eating this all alone? Then how about him? Hindi siya kakain? Kahit kaunti lang?


"Hindi ka pa ba nagugutom? Anong kakainin mo?" I worriedly asked. He's on diet but it's not good to skip meals.


"Can we have an agreement?" he asked instead of answering my question.


Pinilig ko ang aking ulo.


"Agreement for what?"


"Agreement for not asking questions to each other. I don't like to hear someone's concern, interrogation about how am I, what I'm doing, and most likely — questions to fill your curiosity," aniya kaya suminghap ako.


"I'm just concerned. It's already late, and you haven't eaten anything," pangangatwiran ko.


Masama na ba ang tanong na iyon? And questions to fill curiosity? Wow. Is he implying I'm chismosa and nosy? I want to know him, but he's not letting me. Or he never allows anyone from the start.


"I'm already a grown-up man. I know what I'm doing. I'll eat if I want to. No need to remind me," giit niya at nagpunas ng kamay dahil tapos ng maghugas.


Okay, fine.


No asking questions then!


I rolled my eyes and irritably got the spoon and fork to start eating. It's good, but I won't complement it. Hindi man niya tinikman kanina ang luto niya bago ihain. He's confident that it will taste great. He knew he was a good cook than anyone else.


"By the way, do you have a charger?" tanong ko sa gitna ng pagkain.


"I just said don't ask questions," pamimilosopo niya.


What?! Pati mga ganoong maliit na bagay bawal tanungin?


"You said I'll find my way to go home. I need a map before I leave. Paano kung maligaw ako?"


He chuckled.


"Then get lost. I told you, you'll regret coming with me."


I gasped. How cruel!


"Don't ask and search by yourself to see if I have. Kung ano lang ang nakikita mo, iyon lang ang meron dito," he continued and began to run in the thread mill.


He's doing exercise without eating anything? Hindi ba masama iyon? He's impossible. May pagpapahalaga ba siya sa katawan niya?


Pagkatapos kumain, ang paghahanap ng charger ang pinagkakaabalahan kong gawin. Baka hinahanap na ako sa bahay. Alam naman nila na may adyenda akong gagawin ngayong araw pero hindi pa ako umuuwi. I'll be late in Huerta too if I didn't get out of here before 2:00 PM.


I haven't seen Alexius using his phone either, so it bothers me. Baka hindi niya dala.


"Still can't find anything?" Alexius teased while playing billiards. After doing a workout, he's spoiling himself inside his man cave. So this is what he's doing for his rest day?


Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin nang makita ko ang mapaglarong ngisi niya. Tila tuwang-tuwa na wala akong makita magmula kanina. I already searched upstairs. Itong man cave niya ay iniisa-isa ko na rin ang bawat sulok pero wala!


"Kailan ka ba babalik sa Escalante?"


He shrugged.


Napapikit ako sa kawalan ng pasensya. Really? So papanindigan talaga ang huwag magtanong at huwag sumagot. I guess, I can do anything what I want here, huh? Hindi ko na kailangan pang magtanong kung pwede ko bang buksan ang recording set niya o kainin lahat ng gusto ko sa fridge.


Let's be free here, Solaire!


I decided to go upstairs. I'll be stuck with this place for I don't know how many hours more or so. Tanghali na at kagabi pa ang suot ko kaya kailangan ko nang maligo. I shamelessly chose anything from Alexius' closet and went inside the bathroom.


I don't have spare undergarments so it took me more than two hours to prepare. Nilabhan ko muna ang mga panloob ko at pinatuyo gamit ng blow-dryer kaya nagtagal ako sa banyo.


I was going to went down after drying my hair but the scenery outside caught me off guard. Parang bata akong tumakbo palabas sa balcony para pagmasdan ang paligid.


Oh my. It was so pretty!


I think I'll really stay here for a while or can I live here? I can live forever here! It was so peaceful. The seawater, the coffee-colored sand, the incoming sunset, pink skies, cirrus clouds, and the mountain from afar?


I'm glad to be alive!


But Alexius is not, in any case. How can he choose to die knowing this view will always welcome you?