One Million Tiny Things

How do you do it?

Dear Mrs. Johnson,

I was just sitting in detention and Mr. Hegbert asked us to write a composition, "Creative Writing", I think he called it. Well, there is probably nothing creative about this but I hope he gives this to you because there were somethings I really want to ask you.

How do you do it?

How you always manage to single me out? Do I really look that suspicious or is it some age old grudge that you are out to get me for? Did I steal your pew at church or accidentally sell you a stale hot dog at the mall? I really don't remember but if I did offend you, I heartily apologise, do let me know how I can make it up to you.

I am honestly curious as to why or how you always assume that I am the one who ate the class Frog, threw a rock at Ms. Potts car, stuck the pin on Rosy's chair and did numerous other crazy things? I mean a few harmless pranks, fine, even I wouldn't put it past me. 

But all of them. Really? Does my face scream lunatic? Eitherway if you arrest, or in this case send to detention, potential suspects just based on there appearance wouldn't it make you a pretty sucky detective?

Couldn't it really have been anyone though? I mean if my face is sneaky, then what about Sneaky Danny, it is in his name for crying out loud. And sweet little Jasmine who sits at front and never makes a mum sound. She can be really vicious you know, pulled out all of Amelia's hair extensions at someone 's pool party after getting called Nerd or something.  Bet you didn't know that about your sweet angel. Plot Twist.

Anyway, assuming I did them there never really was proof was there? Atleast not all the time. So how am I or anyone for that matter believe your accusations? Am I supposed to believe that you sniffed my scent from the crime scene or found DNA samples that matched mine?

Don't get me wrong, I mean no disrespect. I just have questions that need answers. Obviously I can't ask these in school without scoring detention for atleast a fortnight, nor can I pass this note in school because that would look dorky. So I resorted to this genius technique.

Also while we are on the subject of accusations what about our dear teachers. With the biased schooling system we have students never get to testify anything and the staff run around doing anything they please like hooligans. Again no disrespect,  just stating facts.

Don't think I don't know about how you bumped the the Librarian's parked car last Tuesday and just drove away like nothing happened. You really should look around before committing a hit and run. I was right behind. Of course being the matyr I am I would never even dream of reporting you.

Besides what about Miss.Dorothy and the new home economics teacher. Everyone sees them sneak into the Janitor's closet after lunch. But when someone broke that ugly vase which was there y'all blamed me and I got detention. Funny thing is I didn't even show up at school that day.

Some strange discipline system this school has going for it. Atleast they can be proud of how unique it is.

"Oh, you did what?.... No worries. Freddie can take the blame. That's what he is afterall the resident bad boy dump."

I wonder if it's stated in some school hand book or etiquette rule system to blame me for everything. It's not even practical.

Take today for instance some one ate the class frog... raw. Or at least tore out all of its insides for fun and took them home only leaving its bones and skin in the glass box.

Whodunit?
Oh easy-peasy... Freddie.

I got late to school today. I walked in just before the bell. Everyone was already sitting in class. And it would have been a miracle if I managed to tear up frog innards with your hawk eyes watching me. But of course we couldn't violate the apparent school rule to blame me.

First of all gross. I steer clear of them slimy bugs, wouldn't touch one with a barge pole. So it really is amusing that you think I ate it.
How hard was it to blame the French exchange students or Mon.Dupont. I mean don't they eat frog legs like a snack or something over there.

Honestly I prefer French fries, so maybe I would have tried to understand if you blamed me for eating a raw potato. But this is just disgusting.

That is another question. How low do you think of me? Really. Like is there a bar to how disgusting or dangerous my crimes can get. Or is it all just fair game.

Please don't be mad, miss, I just need answers. I hope you would be kind enough to let me have them atleast a few, the suspense is killing me.

Curiously,
Fredrick.