A Flame From The Past

37: Begging Pt.2

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I was stomping off to the bathroom, I wouldn't say stomping. I was angry, filled with rage as Luca went to talk to Ray and I was letting myself sulk in my rage.

But he followed me, after his short discussion with Ray, straight into the bathroom, so much for my lonesome sulking.

"We bought some things for you, too", he said, leaning against the shower as my hands ran under the water, and were dried with the towel. I felt messy, like my feelings hadn't been set across, like my whole world was in a blaze. I pulled my hair out of the messy bun it was in, as he made his way over standing right behind me and as I turned, my stupid... stupid self collided with his hardened chest.

"That's nice", I mumbled, looking down as I gritted my teeth, giving off the attitude I knew not to. He looked pissed as I got out of his hands, and moved towards the sink, getting ready to wash my face, but he wouldn't budge.

"You won't even call me an ass now?" He smirked, staring at me with such certainty that I wasn't angry, and I honestly didn't know if I was just overthinking this whole thing. It was just Luca being nice to Ray, buying him things, making his room here.

I think my mind was jumping, not thinking things through today had been a whirlwind, so when my mouth opened I knew I had said the wrong thing.

"So you realize you're being an ass right now, wow I thought it was just me", I said angrily, looking into his stone cold eyes. He liked the hate game we played, the banter, he loved it all. But I wasn't loving anything about this, we were fighting now. I had pulled my game face on while he stood there using his smugness and charm to make this dwindle down.

"You're really that upset I want you to move in?" He asked, questioning my thoughts. And I honestly didn't know what to think, it felt strange to me, it felt like just a sweet thing to do for Ray too, but my mind was losing this idea of it. I felt like I was trying to start a fight over nothing.

"You're doing this the wrong way, you want me to move in so you're going through Ray, making him love it here?" I asked, pissed that this gift had led back to 'me' moving in, not Ray, not us.

"I just don't get it, you're so hesitant, it's like any moment you're just going to break up with me, you don't even have any goddamn clothes here, you have so little faith in us", he asked getting angry, becoming more angry, and now we were full on screaming.

"Luca, it's you who has so little faith in me, are you really that worried that I'm just going to break up with you? Just like that", I felt like I was shouting now, as we stood there giving each other dirty looks in the bathroom, and not the good dirty.

"You don't even have clothes here? You could break up with me and we would never have to see each other again, do you know how much I need you?" He asked, reaching for my hand, his charm was indicted, he was now the center of it all. It starts with him and ends with him. Him of all people was insecure about being left, both of us were, but I had never imagined he would be scared by this.

I reached far away from his hand, taking my own shirt off and running to the closet. I grabbed his spare hangers, which were too many and I hung up my shirt as he followed me. Next came my pants, I pulled them off of me and hung them up, next to my lone shirt.

"Do you want me to keep going?" I asked, getting ready to remove my bra, as he shook his head, now a different look in his eyes was given and he wasn't just feeling this insecurity, but something of lust was in his eyes.

"No", he made it clear, as he raced to my lips, crashing against them. I knew it was wrong for us to fight and then for our anger, or strange love for each other take over, but I couldn't help it. He felt too good, and I was too angry to care.