Short stories

Memory problems

I don’t know who I am… A dark fog completely covers my past and my memory. When I look at my reflection in a mirror, I can’t even say who I am or what my age is. I don’t remember my own name! I don’t recognize my face. I’m a stranger to myself. Something strange happened, but I don’t know what it is.

A woman who claims to be my mother came to me with a photo album shortly after I was admitted to the hospital. There were plenty of pictures of a family who seemed very happy. People were having fun at parties, family reunions. The woman showed me a photo of a young woman dressed very well, a drink in her hand. Then she told me that I was working in one of the biggest banks in the city before my accident. What accident? I don’t remember anything. And I thought I was a waitress in a small restaurant!

Apparently, a witness told everything to the police. It happened very quickly: I crossed the street to the pedestrians signal, but a car didn’t respect the traffic light which was red. The hit me over seventy miles an hour when the speed limit is fifty miles an hour. My head received the biggest shock. But there’s something that is not normal… At first, I thought I was imaging things. Then the voices became clearer in my head. I told my “mother” "who had a long talk with the doctor. A psychiatrist came to visit me the next day. He asked many questions, more and more intrusive. I passed numerous psychological tests, as well as several brain scans. Diagnosis: schizophrenia caused by a major head injury.

He then suggested me to “take some vacations”, to stay with my parents for some time to rest and work to recover my memory.

This guy doesn’t care about me! Around me, nobody knows who I am! They don’t know what goes inside my head. I know I’m not crazy! But I prefer to keep it quiet before doing anything. Since they all think I’m crazy, they could lock me in the nuthouse for the rest of my life…

My “mother” won’t stop showing all her photo albums while it doesn’t interest me. I spend my days in bed and I cry very often. I searched my mind to find a piece of my life that I might have not forgotten. I don’t remember anything. There are so many things I want to know, but I dare not ask questions. I’m afraid of what I might discover. And if I was leading a double life?

I had a long discussion with my “mother” who told me that I had just broken up with my boyfriend. I had someone in my life? I finally decided to learn a little more and ask further questions. I asked her what kind of woman I was before the accident. According to her, I was a real workaholic. She couldn’t tell me what happened between my boyfriend and me. And she hastened to change subject! As if she was hiding something. But I didn’t insist. I kept looking at the pictures she showed me once again. I swear I heard the woman said: “I can’t even tell her he was a married man.” So I jumped on the occasion to ask her if I was seeing a married man who refused to leave his wife. She just looked at me and ran away to the kitchen. This is unbelievable! She came back into the living room with a large glass of water. I was still waiting for her answer. A bit impatient, I insisted on my question, repeating what I heard her saying. She just looked at me, saying I was imaging things.

And for a whole month, my “parents” were saying things then pretend otherwise. They talked with the psychiatrist. He met me for an interview, but I didn’t know what to say. It was during this meeting that I realized that due to the accident, I could hear people’s thoughts. I told him about this little detail. Obviously, he laughed at me because he had already made his diagnosis about me: I was just hysterical.

But me, I insisted. Big mistake…

They eventually put me in the nuthouse. They were all afraid of me. I could hear what they were hiding deep inside themselves and it scared them. But I’m not crazy. It’s because of the accident that now I can do that! I’m scared too. I scare myself because I know things that others want to ignore.

What can I do to become normal again?

THE END