Dear Diary, Makaka-move on ba ako?

Twenty One

Hi! :)
Marami pong typos yung chapter na toh kasi I didn't proof read it. Kung madami ng typos yung past chapters, mas madami po dito. xD
Thank you for reading and enjoy this chapter as promised. ;-)
-Jem. c:

* * *

"Kiss me and you will see how important I am."

- Slyvia Plath

* * *

"Happy Birthday!"

Bigla akong nagising nang marinig ko ang boses ng napakaraming tao na sabay sabay ang pag bati sa akin. I blinked twice, pero when I can finally open my eyes, nakita ko yung mga tao na I wouldn't know what to do kapag nawala sila.

"Blow your cake, anak." Sabi ni mommy, habang may dala dalang chocolate chiffon cake. She was smiling at me, and all of them are.

Si mommy, sila tita Janine at tito Gary, si Mae at Christian, at si Nikki...

Teka, nasaan si Paolo?

I looked behind them to make sure na hindi lang sya nag tatago doon, pero wala talaga sya. I sit up, and looked again so I have a better view, but still... wala pa din si Paolo.

Gusto kong tanungin kung nasan si Paolo, but I stopped before I can even let myself be this horrible. Sila ang nandito ngayon, why should I go look for someone na wala naman dito sa tabi ko? I should appreciate these people.

I smiled at them before I took a deep breath. I was about to blow the cake nung bigla akong pinigilan ni Nikki.

"Mag wish ka muna."

I smiled again. What should I wish for? Hindi ko na din talaga alam. Pero ang gusto ko lang manyari eh yung maging masaya ako sa buong taong seventeen na ako. Bahala na si God sa akin, basta ang mahalaga maging masaya ako. I want to be genuinely happy.

I closed my eyes for a second before I blew the candle. Nag palakpakan naman sila as I did, and they're all looking at me. Ang saya saya nila. Parang ako lang yung hindi masaya, which kind of sucked. It's my day anyway, and I will enjoy it.

At tsaka bakit ba si Paolo ang hinahanap ko kaagad? I'm sure na dadating din yun mamaya. But for now, I want to enjoy this moment with these people.

* * *

I twirled my fork sa spaghetti na kinakain ko bago ko ito kainin. Ugh, I closed my eyes as I slowly eat it. Ang sarap talaga mag luto ni mommy ng spaghetti.

I looked at Nikki beside me. Parang hindi man lang nabawasan yung pagkain nya sa plato nya. Naka stare lang sya sa floor, parang ang lalim lalim ng iniisip. I can hear laughter inside the karaoke room habang nag kakantahan sila mommy doon. Kung ano yung kinasaya nung mga tao dun sa loob ng kwarto, eh ganun naman kamiserable yung mukha ni Nikki ngayon. Halos hindi mai-pinta.

"Huy, okay ka lang ba? Bakit di ka kumakaain?" Tanong ko as I shoved another twirl of spaghetti in my mouth.

"Ah," She suddenly found a way put of her trance. "Busog kasi ako."

She smiled at me, pero iba eh. From that smile, I know that something's wrong. I know that something's bugging her. Alam kong may hindi sya sinasabi sa akin na dapat nyang sabihin. She looks so problematic that it bothers me.

"Anong problema?" I asked her in a very serious tone. She just shook her head and looked down on the floor again.

"Nikki, anong problema?" I asked again, more serious this time. She looked at me with scared eyes, and I just... I suddenly felt worried.

"Wala! Ano ka ba?" She stood up from the dining chair and then took my wrist. Hinila nya ako papasok sa karaoke room. "Ang drama drama mo, kumanta ka na nga lang."