The Feeling Of Infinity∞

Fithteen// Catching Time 🎀

 Ruth
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After some hours of suspense and argument, though Gideon took things as a joke despite how serious I was trying to be, my attention was geared to something else. The semiquaver tattoo design on his neck captured my attention.

"Can I ask you something?" I suddenly become inquisitive.
"Sure!" Answers right away.
"It's a bit of a personal question though..."I become unease.
"Just ask, I'll give an answer if I have one to your question." He's over confident.
"Your tattoo..."
"What about it?" Cuts in before I could finish my statement.
"Let me finish first!"I'm even more annoyed when he cuts in before I could finish.
"What's it about?"
"I mean,I know it's just a semiquaver tattoo design and placed right next to your neck but,I mean there's a meaning to it right?" I offer a fake smile.
He goes mute for a while.
"I love music!" Simple and straight forward answer I guess.
"Ah!" I'm confused.
"What?" He knows I was probably expecting him to say more than that.
"So no story attached to it or something kinda inspiration behind it?" His mood changes after I say this.
"Yeah!" He says as if it was a whisper.
"Okay?" I notice his sudden mood.
"How about that?" I ask as I point to  another tattoo with finely written designed font on written on his right hand.
"Amo-m-om..." I tongue twist myself trying to pronounce it.
"Amo mom!" He pronounces it for me and I whisper it to myself.
"What does it mean?" I ask curiously.
"I love mom!" Answers with a shy and quiet voice.
"Really?" I wasn't expecting him to be a Mama's boy. Nowadays,it's hard to find such guys.
"Yeah. It's just translated in Latin."
"Not that bad,you must have been really close to your mom; I'm sure though she's no more but she's always nearer to you." I may have over crossed the line again reminding him about his mom. The second time I'm doing this.

His face is suddenly clouded by sadness but he's good at hiding it, though not from me.
"I'm sorry!" I immediately understood what I said is the reason behind the mood swing.
" You know, sometimes I feel like wherever she is right now, she'd be greatly disappointed with me and how I've turned out to be."
"Don't say that! Maybe you made few mistakes, which we all do but that doesn't mean she's disappointed in you." I try cheering him up. He was the one trying to cheer me up moments ago and I turned out ruining that and I'm now compelled to make him feel better.

"After she past away,it was like the universe turned cold,dark and happiness was reaped up from my life and shredded to pain." Harsh words but it ushers us into a therapy session.
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According to him, before his mom passed away, he was perhaps one of the last person she spoke too and he was too young to understand that that was gonna be the last time there'd ever be talking to each other.
"You've grown up so much,my boy!" She said as she struggled to breathe.
"I know, mom." He said. He was probably around eight at that time.
"I'm happy and same time sad!" She says in agony.
"Why?" Gideon asks naively;he was too young to understand the reality at hand.
She places her hands on his head as tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Don't cry..." He says naively.
"I know God we heal you!" He says with faith
"But he will right?" He asks but her silence already says otherwise.

He has a nose mask on and some kinda protective clothing to prevent the spread of further infection. At the condition she is, anything can trigger the unexpected.

"Sometimes it's better to accept rest than too fight and suffer." She smiles,takes off his mask and touches his cheeks.
"I give you my blessings when you find your dream girl..." Says smiling,he smiles back with tears hanging in his eyes waiting to drop.
Though naive,he was fully aware of what she meant and where the conversation was heading.

"Must have been really hard for you." I say cause even I could feel his pain. I kinda envy her though, knowing she would be gone soon never filled her heart with fear.