He Married the Stripper.

I Miss You, I Want You.

---ALEX---

I watched as everyone around me laughed, talked, and overall enjoyed themselves while I just downed every drink they kept passing me. My friends have finally stopped trying to initiate a conversation with me, they've stopped teasing me about how I don't really have a wife and was just making excuses and so now I'm just here at the bar, people-watching and wondering how and why the hell I even bothered to come when the only reason I did is not even here.

To be honest, I was looking forward to this trip because Emily promised to show me around Davao even though I've been here before and I've been to all the touristy spots years ago but she said she'd show me Davao the way she did when she was younger even though all I want to do is spend our free time indoors because we've both been busy the last few weeks and we haven't been spending time together. I even upgraded our room so we'd be far away from everyone because I know I won't be able to hold anything back since it's been so long since we touched each other. 

Everything was going well until I saw that guy last night. How the hell is he able to ruin everything every time I see him? I came home early last night after working overtime the last couple of days to compensate for the Davao trip. We shared the same elevator going up, I don't know what's wrong with him but he doesn't look like he can take any hint that I do not like him. That just because he's 'friends' with my wife doesn't automatically mean we're also friends.

"Kamusta na nga pala si Lolo Erwin? Dumaan ako sa room nya kanina pero kakaalis lang daw niya para sa MRI appointment nya. Bumubuti na ba lagay nya?" He suddenly asked.

"Excuse me?" What is he talking about?

"Si Lolo Erwin, yung Lolo ni Emily. Gusto daw ipalipat ni Tita Aura sa mas malaking kwarto si Lolo pero wala pang available, I tried pulling some strings pero wala talaga silang extra rooms." Nasa ospital na naman ang Lolo ni Emily? Kailan pa? Ano na namang nangyari, bakit hindi niya sinabi sakin? And more importantly, bakit alam ng lalaking to?

"He's fine. I'm taking care of it." I told him and pretended to be busy on my phone so he'd stop talking to me. I sent Gigi a text asking why she didn't tell me Lolo Erwin is in the hospital again, she replied and told me she didn't know either.

When I got home, Emily was packing another bag, a bag I know she's not planning on taking to Davao.

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi sakin na nasa ospital na naman si Lolo Erwin? I had to learn from a neighbor!" 

"Bakit maaga ka ngayon? Kumain ka na ba?" She asked me instead of answering.

"Don't change the subject. Anong nangyari?"

"Madalas atakahin ng hika si Lolo kaya dinala na namin ulit sya sa ospital kagabi." She said they couldn't find anything wrong yet but knowing his condition it's probably just another complication. Gusto daw ng Tita Aura nya na doon na lang muna sa ospital si Lolo Erwin dahil nahihirapan silang mag-anak na asikasuhin sya dahil hindi rin naman nila alam kung anong dapat gawin. Nakita daw sya doon ni Nathan dahil hinire sya ng marketing department ng ospital.

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi sakin? I can call someone and get him transferred to a bigger room with round-the-clock care."

"Naiwan ko yung cellphone ko dito kagabi at kakauwi ko lang kanina, hindi ko naman saulo number kaya hindi ko narin nasabi sayo." I didn't even know she wasn't home last night, I just assumed she was already asleep kaya hindi ko na siya inistorbo and when I left this morning akala ko naman nauna na siyang umalis sakin. 

"Okay lang si Lolo. Nasa private room na kami at hindi naman kailangan ni Lolo ng mas malaking kwarto. Okay lang kami and I don't want to owe you more than I already do." 

"What does that even mean? Asawa mo ako, you wouldn't owe me dahil obligasyon kong tulungan ka at ang pamilya mo."

"Except I'm not really your wife, Alex. May kasunduan lang tayo kaya nasa ganitong posisyon tayo." She's right, I don't have any obligation to take care of her family or her problems for her but I love her and I just want to take care of her.  

"Then what about him?! Bakit sya nandun? Nakilala niya Lolo mo but I can't? He pulled some strings to get him a different room and I can't? Bakit ang daming restrictions when it comes to me but not with him?" I yelled. I wanted to argue more to tell her how I feel again and tell her I don't care about the contract anymore, that I just want her to depend on me because she can, that she doesn't owe me anything at all because I love her.

"Nagkataon lang na nandun siya and as usual nagpapa-rinig lang si Tita Aura ng malaman nyang nagta-trabaho si Nathan sa ospital. Hindi ko naman tinanggap yung alok niya..." She tried explaining but I talked over her again, I'm mad and I know she hates it when I yell but I can't help it. Why was he there and I wasn't? I want to be the first one she talks to about these things, I want to be the one who gets to offer her help and assistance, I just want to be there for her. For anything and everything.

I wanted to argue more but she got a phone call and when it ended sinabi nyang kailangan nyang mag-overnight ulit sa ospital dahil sila ni Gelo ang magba-bantay kay Lolo Erwin, she needs to be there early in the morning to deal with paper works at para narin kausapin ang mga doctor na tumitingin kay Lolo Erwin.

She said she'd be home before we leave for Davao but she kept getting delayed because there were either some tests that needed to be done or the doctors haven't arrived yet. So in the end I left by myself while she promised she'd come as soon as everything was settled.

Why did I even come here? I should have just stayed home and waited for her, bakit ba ngayon ko pa na-isipang maging masunurin? Wala namang akong pakialam kung magalit man sakin si Willa at Patrick dahil hindi ako sumipot, sa dami ng bisita nila I'm sure they can get someone else to replace me in no time anyway.

I saw the notification on my phone before I even felt it vibrate, probably because I've been staring at it every chance I get. I quickly stood up and went outside to call her. 

"The number you have dialed is either unattended or out of coverage area."

Bakit unattended agad? She just texted me! I tried calling again but it just goes straight to voicemail so I left one.

I looked at the starlit sky, she would love it here, she would love to see all the stars in the sky and watch the waves hit the shore. We were supposed to go to the museum where her Dad used to work at, she was going to take me to her favorite restaurant and to all the places she used to go to. 

She was so excited.

I was excited.

She's probably not coming, not after how I acted last night. 

I should just go home. 

I should have just kept my mouth shut and listened to what she had to say.

I miss her.

I want to be with her.