36 MINUTES TO FALL, jaemin ✓

35 | death

❝ Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find the most disturbing? Why?❞

"My father's," Yumi said. "At this point, I don't know how exactly he feels about me, about my mom. I guess...I guess I want him to tell us the truth with no sugarcoating, so that at least I'll know. Even if sometimes not knowing is better than knowing, with him, I need to know. If he died before that, before he told us anything, then I'd spend the rest of my life with so many questions, too many worries. I don't think I could live like that. To be honest...I don't know if I love him anymore. At least with my mother, there's this affection that's never really faded, but with him..."

"Your emotions about him are really mixed up, aren't they?"

"More of being in complete chaos, but yes, they are."

"I wish I could phrase it as easily as that," Jaemin said dejectedly. "I think I would say my parents' death. We have our differences, yes. But at the same time, they are the ones who raised me and instilled most of the morals I have now in me. I owe a lot to them, even if sometimes it doesn't feel like they deserve it. And I do have that attachment to them, the kind of attachment that kids have. Never wanting to leave their side despite everything they do and say."

"There it is again," Yumi said. "The way we're ruled by them in one way or another all the time."

"Is that really avoidable?" Jaemin asked. "No matter what our parents have done, some part of us will always be attached to them, if not love them. By that, I mean that we'll think of them and remember any good times. Stuff like that."

"It's not," she agreed.

"Okay, here's the final question," he exhaled a long breath. Yumi shifted her phone to the other ear. "This is the one where we finally determine the outcome of the quiz. Or at least, after it. You ready?"

"No, but go ahead anyway."

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WORD COUNT: 352