Entropy (WANGXIAN FanFic)

12 - Losing Self-Restraint

((Mild Mature Content, in chapter))
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Wuxian sat comfortably on his bed in lotus position, meditating. He had such a long day that he needed to relax and calm down a bit. Wuxian could only manage a few minutes before feeling he could not relax. His mind was everywhere. He had so many thoughts flying around in his head.

'Why does Chenqing allow Lan Zhan to hold her? Did I call Chenqing a her? I mean I suppose as I also call Suibian a he...wait...A'Xain you are getting nowhere! Why are you getting distracted?! Why Lan Zhan? Chenqing, why him?' All those thoughts kept come one after another. Wuxian felt like his head would explode for all the thoughts it was holding.

Wuxian opened his eyes and let out a sigh in frustration. Lan Zhan could sense Wuxian's tension and wanted to know what was happening. Wuxian could tell by glancing at him. Meditation always helped in the past when his brain was going a million miles an hour, but this time, it was not.

"I am okay, Lan Zhan," Wuxian stated, glancing at him.

"Wei Ying seems distracted," was all Wangji said. Wuxian stared at him for a good moment. Wuxian managed longer, complete sentences from Wangji before, now he was speaking in short responses.

"Wei Ying is distracted," Wuxian replied, slightly teasing Lan Zhan.

Lan Zhan picked up on the tease but ignored it, "want to tell me why?" He asked Wuxian.

"I was just thinking too much that I couldn't focus," Wuxian answered.

"About what?"

Wuxian was wondering if he should talk it through with Lan Zhan about Chenqing. Then he wondered if he could unsheathe Suibian as it is also spiritual and will only allow Wuxian to sheathe him.

"Actually," Wuxian started to say and got off the bed and grabbed his sword and made his way to Lan Zhan, "do me a favor."

"Hmm?"

"Unsheathe Suibian," Wuxian demanded.

"Why?" Lan Zhan asked.

"It's just an experiment, please? Just sheathe him?" Wuxian asked slightly, begging.

Lan Zhan stood up and took a grip on Suibian's halt. He glanced up at Wuxian and then back at the sword and tried to unsheathe it...much to Wuxian's surprise, when the sword opened for Lan Zhan!

"Now what?" Lan Zhan asked.

Wuxian stood there in shock, 'What was going on?' He thought.

"L-L-Lan Zhan, my sword is spiritual," Wuxian answered, "I am the only one who is able to unsheathe Suibian. Meaning it is unsealed for you."

Lan Wangji looked up at Wuxian to see if he was lying. His expression tells Wangji that Wuxian was indeed, telling the truth. He then looked at the sword.

'I can wield Wei Ying's sword, and hold Chenqing?' Lan Zhan thought to himself, 'but why?'

"Well, you allowed me to, maybe that's why I can?" Wangji questioned.

"I don't think so, if that was the case, my grandmother and my martial uncles would have been able to hold Chenqing and sheathe Suibian."

Wangji put the sword back into its sheathe, "who am I to you?" He thought out loud. Wuxian looked into Lan Zhan's eyes, he too, was wondering who Wangji was to him.

'Is Lan Zhan someone special to me?' Wuxian thought, 'I do feel comfortable around him, and I feel like he is someone who I can trust wholeheartedly. Normally I don't trust others this easily, but Lan Zhan seemed to find a why past that and gain my trust.'

"Wei Ying?" Lan Zhan called out taking Wuxian out of his thoughts.

"Are you...." Wuxian began to say but then stopped himself. He needed time to think on this, "honestly, I do trust you more than I have ever trusted anyone. But I think this is something I need to really think about."

"This is something both of us need to think about," Wangji said. Wuxian just nodded as he watched Wangji sit back down at the table he was sitting at and picked up his book he was reading.

Wuxian decided he should go work on his punishment so he sat down across from Wangji and took out his things to finish working. Wangji was impressed at how Wuxian just moved on from that moment. Though it was something they needed to discuss again later, Wangji was just happy that he gained Wuxian's trust.

Wangji always had a hard time being around others. People would usually stare at him from a distance to admire his beauty, but they were also distant for another reason. They look at Wangji and see his cold expression only to feel intimidated or uncomfortable with him. It was something that Wangji had gotten used to, being misunderstood. After he and Wei Ying worked out their issues from earlier, Wangji wondered how Wuxian was so comfortable around him.

'Does he not find me intimidating?' Wangji thought, 'Do I like Wei Ying?'

Wangji couldn't help but glance up and look at Wuxian from time to time. He found himself admiring Wei Ying. The glow from the candles in the room gave Wuxian such a breathtaking look. The shadows on his facial features only enhanced his beauty more. His cheek bones caused a nice shape on his face and his jaw, Wangji felt his mouth water the moment he admired the jawline.

Wuxian's eyes were a gentle silver, and they were big and warm enough to melt someone's cold demeanor. And his lips. The smile attracted Wangji more to him. The cute bunny teeth that showed when he was smiling his brightest smile, and the mole under his lip gave his mouth something more unique to look at. Wangji felt himself get flustered, as his face started to feel warm. When out of nowhere, he felt a twitch on his lower region between his legs. Wangji was a bit taken by surprise. He was getting lustful over Wei Ying!

"You keep on copying," Wangji said standing and turned away from him quickly to hide himself, "I am going to go bathe."

"Okay," Wuxian said and watched Wangji disappear into the bathroom to bathe.

Wangji stood there in the bathing room for a moment trying to compose himself. Once he felt composed enough, he filled the bath with refreshingly comfortable warm water. He undressed and sat in the water for a good while before he felt relaxed. The only thing that wasn't relaxed was his little brother down below the water. Wangji had never been in this kind of situation before. The only thing he could think of was taking the urge away. But the more Wuxian popped in his head, the harder his friend got.

So he decided to try and relieve himself. He took his member in his hand and started to slowly pump up and down. He was starting to feel more and moved his hand faster. Not to make noise, he bit his lower lip only gaining more pleasure with himself. Wangji suddenly wondered what it would be like to be in Wuxian's hand, or his mouth. Such dirty and pleasurable thoughts only made him urge for release. Quietly panting with pleasure he moved his hand as fast as he could. His body filled with such a new, desirable feeling, and warmth building deep in his stomach. When he released, the felt like it was spinning.

Wangji took a bit to calm his breathing as his manhood finally relaxed after it had been relieved. The water of the bath he was in was now starting to get cold. He ignored that at the moment, he began to feel a bit guilty about having inappropriate thoughts about Wei Ying, as well as the deed that he had just done. He was born in a clan that was to maintain self-restraint, but he just felt like he had lost his self-restraint and acted on impulse. He knows he shouldn't feel guilty about pleasing himself, but he did feel guilty about his thoughts of Wuxian.

Wangji started to question his feelings for him and wondered if he should sit down and get advice from his brother. Would his brother be disappointed to know what he thinks? He felt at a loss as he got out of the water and dried himself off. He put on fresh night time robes and emptied the water from the tube. Wangji went back to the main room only to see Wei Ying still seated at the table writing out the rules needed to finish. Wangji went over and put his book away and then sat on his bed to meditate for a while. He needed to compose himself and forget things for a bit...even though so much is going on within his heart right now.

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Well, what do you guys think? First Chenqing and now Suibian? What about Wangji's guilty pleasurable thoughts and his moment in the bath? What will happen? Will he go speak with his brother for advice?