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!!! TW: MILD PANIC ATTACK, PLEASE SKIP THE ENTIRE CHAPTER FOR THOSE WHO ARE SENSITIVE TO THIS!!!
Dont push yourself :)
It was the end of the day, she sat in the practice room by herself in the corner, clearly ignoring Yoongi's offer. She didn't want to burden more people with her trouble because she thought that if anyone else were to help her, they would also fall, be anchored down. She didn't want to do that to Yoongi. She didn't want to repeat what she just caused.
Her face crumbles like tissues, she turns gray. Tears of blue silently fell down her pale out from her brown eyes.
Why couldn't I be better? Less selfish? Less of a disappointment? She condemned herself.
"Why didn't you come to me? I told you if you ever need anything to come to be."
Recognising the voice, she didn't want to look up. She couldn't face him, she felt pathetic, terrible, an utter disappointment. The image of Eun-Byeol, the once happy, bubbly unnie now transformed into a dark shadow that haunted her mind. She wished she could've gone but this guilt, this fear of anchoring someone down, engulfed her like a shadow over stone. You could never get rid of your shadow unless darkness took over.
Yoongi kneeled down to the younger girl and placed a comforting had on her slumped shoulder as Areum hopeless attempted to suppress her crying.
Yoongi knew what she felt, maybe not in the exact situation, but the feeling of wanting to suppress these feelings and not wanting to tell anyone. Wanting to hide away.
"You don't have to tell me anything, believe me, I understand but you should at least cry it out."
She then started to let her tears fall down, trying to be as quiet as possible to not be annoying, she felt Yoongi sit next to as she cried. It felt comforting in a way, this was probably the very few times where someone had comforted her. It felt nice but what else did she feel? Failure? Guilt? Disappointment?
People were trying to help her yet she couldn't do anything. She couldn't open up. She tried but it was so hard. Once again she just felt selfish.
She had supportive people around her, people who offered their time, their energy to help yet she couldn't give anything back. She was scared. So scared of judgement but at the same time, she couldn't put these feelings into coherent words without stumbling. Areum barely knew what she felt. She could barely comprehend it and it was terrifying. She wanted to escape but how could she escape when she didn't even know what she was trapped in.
