Void || A DreamNotFound Story

One

Clay had been preparing long and hard for his last couple of days in the UK, though now they were here, he couldn't comprehend how he thought he would ever be ready to say goodbye to his best-friend. 

"You got everything packed?" Sapnap asked, placing his hand on Clay's shoulder.

"I...I think so." Clay mumbled gazing at the bedroom floor as small pools collected in his eyes.

"Hey brother, don't start welling up now, we haven't even left yet. Besides, I'm making sure that you have the time of your life before you leave tomorrow morning. You're going to LOVE IT!" Sapnap screamed, hoping Clay's face would light up. Clay grinned slightly as an attempt to reabsorb the painful beads that pooled in his worried, sad, little emerald eyes; he failed as they escaped, running down his cheeks.

"Look, Clay..." Sapnap began, cupping Clay's face and wiping away his tears. "I know that you're scared but you made this decision months ago and I think we both know it's for the best. You're gonna be far away, sure, but I'm always a call away. You're gonna be exploring Florida, you're gonna meet so many people and don't forget about the endless amounts of adventures you're going to go on." He paused, allowing Clay to take in what he'd just said but he remained stood there, frozen. Crying his heart out. Not a single word, not even a sound had left his mouth. Sapnap could tell Clay had started to overthink his life choices and he knew deep down that he was headed for a downward spiral; if he wasn't there already.

"You're going to have such an amazing time doing shit without me, if anything, I should be the one crying dude." He paused again slipping a slight chuckle. Sapnap stared at Clay and waited a minute or two yet he was still stood, pale as anything, still crying; almost lifeless. "Clay. Look at me." he said lifting up his head. Clay's eyes were all puffy and red despite not even rubbing them to relieve himself of the pain he was feeling.

"I love you brother, I'll always be here for you and I am sure that you are smart enough to realize that after all these years of knowing you, I can tell when you're headed the wrong way." said Sapnap pulling his best friend into a warm embrace. Clay pulled away after a minute or so.

"Brother..." he began, eyes still streaming. Sapnap looked at him sympathetically. "I love you and I know you'll always want me to do what is best for me-" he paused, his brain fighting his heart. He took a deep breath yet he couldn't get his words out. Between each breath, his words seemed to fade away. As did his vision. His breaths only got deeper yet more shallow. He screwed his eyes shut. He tried to regain his breath as well as his words yet nothing seemed to be changing. He backed against the bedroom door, sliding down to the floor.

"Clay, it's okay, I'm here." said Sapnap calmly, wrapping his arms around him. He swayed gently with him, counting. "Clay, listen to me okay? Breathe in for three, out for three. In...One, two, three... And out...One, two, three" Clay followed Sapnap's voice,  the static fuzz gradually disappearing and turning into bright lights. He slowly opened his eyes, no longer trapped in his mind.

An "I'm sorry..." escaped Clay's lips and he sniffed, crying into Sapnap's shoulder, defeated.

"Dude, seriously, it's fine. How many times have I told you, eh? I'm always gonna be here for you." he sighed, rubbing Clay's back.

Clay sat up, his sore eyes meeting his brother's kind ones. "Sapnap...?" he managed to let out hoarsely.

"I'm all ears bro, take your time." he replied tranquilly.

"I- I don't want to leave you behind... I-I'm worried of what will happen. I NEED you. I NEED you to survive, I NEED you there with me, I can't do anything alone, anything I TRY to do by myself turns out either REALLY fucking good or REALLY SHITTY, even you know its RARE for anything I do to be good, the only good thing I have managed to keep is our friendship and even now I am SCARED SHITLESS, flying all this distance away from you. It's because I feel everything will change and I am just so sorry for being such a SHIT FRIEND; piling all of this on you, I HATE feeling this way and I wish I didn't make the choice to leave all these months ago and... and-" He was cut off; Sapnap's hand over his mouth. 

"It's okay to be scared. You don't need me to be there in the flesh whenever you take a breath. You have done so many great things in your life without me Clay and..." he sighed before continuing. "And in Florida, there are so many more epic events calling you out there. Look, you don't NEED anyone but yourself. Believe in yourself dude, hell, you know I believe in you right?" he stopped looking at him with hopeful eyes.

"Y-You believe in me...?"

"Of course I fucking do, you're my brother. Look, not everything will seem clear to you right now but all I ask is One. Thing. Okay?"

Clay gasped with genuine excitement "You want me to stay here instead of going to Florida?!"

"No you dummy. I want you to have a fucking great time today before you leave. I'll be visiting you 8 weeks or so after you move tomorrow. I've got it all planned out. But until then, you're gonna go get a shower, get changed and be ready for one of the best days of your fucking life! Got that?" Sapnap said smiling wildly.

Clay couldn't help but smile back, neither could he help the growing void in his heart as his brain corrupted his happy thoughts.

~~~~~

Damn, poor Clay... 

At least Sapnap's tryna hype him up right? RIGHT?

Anyways what do you think of this first chapter? I think I did okay but maybe could've been better... Idk... Let me know your thoughts <3

Hope you're all ready for the next chapter (This was a long one, almost 1k words wth?!)

See you guys later ig, have a great day!

-Envy <3