This boy next to my room

32

Connor

And as usual, I'm hiding in a corner of the yard with a cigarette between my lips. Tyler is not with me today, he stopped talking to me two days ago. The reason is completely stupid.

Cynthia and most of my other girl friends have also dropped me, I'll let you guess why.. And yes, it was because of me and me alone. I accidentally called out the name of the girl I hate the most while I was fucking Cynthia.

I still don't know what came over me but one thing is for sure, even if I can't totally accept this idea, I have a sexual attraction towards June.

And it cost me all my friends.

I sigh and throw my cigarette on the ground before crushing it and scattering the butts. This day is going to be extremely shitty and my desire to finish it is at its peak. Besides, if I still had the possibility of it, I would have asked my father to change me of reformatory not to cross again the bitch of June.

But unfortunately that's impossible. He would never want to, not after what happened.

I put these unpleasant thoughts out of my head and start walking inside the hall. The wind is blowing a lot today, a sign that we're coming nicely into autumn.

My guess is that most people are in the play room and that's the place I'd like to avoid at all costs, but I'm tired of being a friendless guy so as a 'nice' person would do, I'm going to go and apologize like a gentleman to Cynthia.

To tell you that I'm not stressing would be a lie, because I hate apologies; for me it's showing these weaknesses to someone in exchange for a simple forgiveness and at any moment I can be repackaged.

But anyway, my apology will be sincere because after thinking about it, I think it wasn't very fair of me to say June's name out there while I was having sex with Cynthia. A few months ago I wouldn't have done anything because I had warned her that I wasn't ready to get involved in anything with her and she told me that she wasn't either, but it seems that she's starting to get more and more attached to me from her reaction.

I'm going to straighten this out with her.

I don't want any kind of relationship with her or anyone else for that matter.

No sooner have I set foot in the stone building than I meet the green eyes of June. Shockingly electric, very sharp, is the first thing I feel. Her eyes hurt me, too much. I haven't seen her in a little over three days, even in the bathroom.

I think she was gone for a day outside the reformatory but obviously she came back. My eyes then move to the person standing next to her, Tyler.

I swallow when I see where his hand is located.

On June's shoulder.

I still have a vague memory of the evening party, when we were in the closet. She had told me that Jacob was not her boyfriend but that she was interested in Tyler, and seeing them together turns my stomach.

I understand better why he stopped talking to me. For her, so he could get closer to her. He fucked up our fucking friendship for that bitch!

The bitch I want to fuck.

Besides when did they get so close ?

I frown and return my gaze to June again, she hasn't moved her pupils an inch. They are still there looking at me. I give her the blackest look I can muster and I can almost see her eyebrows twitching in incomprehension.

The next minute, I turn right into the play room without even giving her a last look. This bitch is ruining my life here.

And to think that not long ago I was the one doing it.

I scan the room until I find my target playing ping-pong with other people. I walk towards her quite serenely, I have already prepared my scenario in mind.

When I arrive behind her, I put my two hands on her belly and push her gently towards me. I feel her startle but quickly enough understand the situation. Once our two bodies are glued together, I place a kiss on the back of her neck before moving up to her ears and whispering a soft "I'm sorry."

It seems to work because her face stretches, a sign that she is smiling.

I step back and give her time to turn around and when she does, her eyes are not on me but rather, on someone behind me.