This boy next to my room

64

June

He doesn't waste a second more before going back down to remove my panties. I shudder and prefer to close my eyes. I don't know what he's going to do and from his sudden stop, he doesn't seem to like what he sees.

This thought tears at my heart, preventing me from opening my eyes again. But when I feel his wet lips kissing my stomach again, I open them and discover him with an extremely reassuring smile on his face.

"It's risky, you know, the door doesn't have a lock."

I smile at him and look towards the door. At any moment, someone walks in and lectures us but it doesn't really matter to me because I'm leaving this place soon anyway.

"With Cynthia you seem to be more confident." I remark sarcastically.

Maybe I shouldn't have said that because his smile, along with mine, fades. It's true that even in a moment like this, I can't help but imagine them doing the exact same thing again.

"It's not the same thing. Everyone knew I was fucking her."

"And you're afraid they'll find out you were... too ?"

"June, please, you know very well that with you it's different."

I close my eyes again, sighing. It can't be a moment before things get out of hand with him.

"I don't love Cynthia, I won't fuck her again if that's what you want."

And how would I be, once I left?

It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. I don't even want to open them anymore because I know in advance that I'll burst into tears.

"Is that what you want ? That I stop fucking her ?"

"I don't care either way." I slash to shut him up for good.

I can feel him tense up but despite that, no hurtful words come out of his mouth instead he starts kissing my belly again. I thought I had regained enough control over myself because of the anger but finally one kiss can make me lose my mind.

"Sometimes I feel like you're bipolar." He says between kisses.

My eyebrows furrow as he adds his tongue, my mind goes unsteady and I stifle a groan.

I open my eyes when I feel him smile against my skin, he stares at me.

"I don't know if I love you or hate you." I sigh.

"Maybe both.."

He parades me again, this time going down to my bare crotch. My anger has evaporated, giving way to desire instead.

"You look beautiful by the way." He said before depositing his mouth on my intimacy, taking my soul from my body.

My fingers grab abruptly the sheets and my basin rises in the emotion of the moment. But with his hands, he grabs my hips to stabilize them, it is a torture, an incredible pleasant torture. By reflex, I catch the extremities of his skull filled by hair.

Moans burn my throat pleasantly, at first I tried not to release them but the more he accentuates his movements, the more they release themselves.

"Lower.." He whispers.

But despite this, I continue.

Then he stops, walks back up to me. I realize with difficulty that I was carried away, perhaps too much imported.

"I said lower." He whispers again, but this time placing the palm of his hand against my mouth.

It's by looking at him and fully realizing the situation that I realize that I have always been attracted to him, I have always loved him in some way. He's the only one who makes me feel so many emotions at the same time, both positive and negative. I hate him so much for that too.

He is a paradox, our relationship will remain paradoxical in my mind, once I am gone. Because unfortunately, I don't think I can keep in touch with him, it has been an adventure of several months and it ends here.

From the first day I saw him verbally sparring with the guard who was showing me my room, a horribly arrogant look on his face, I knew I would hate him, but at the same time, I knew he was going to be so intriguing to me.

And what intrigues, attracts.

He is proof of that.

Things will never be clear with us and I don't think getting into a real relationship with him would be a good idea because we have countless arguments.

We may be too young to know how to love each other in a healthy way but I hope that one day he will be mine.

I take the time to stare at his pupils dilated by the pleasure that consumes him, I know he feels the same way about me. He hates me as much as he is magnetized by me.

I suddenly realize that my cheeks are wet, not from his kisses but from tears. I can't see his face anymore but feeling his heart beating against my chest, I know he's going crazy.