TRACE DIMAGIBA (Wild Men Series 1)

022*

CHLOE

I received a call kaninang mga 4 P.M., from Harriet, at sabi ay nasa QC siya kasama ni Paige. They wanna see me later, they say pupuntahan nila ako dito sa place ko kung hindi ako makikipagkita. The time is already past 6 P.M. and I am still not decided kung sasama ba ako sa kanila if sakali magyaya sila.

I am not in a good mood, dahil ito sa ginawa ni Trace. I went home without my undies and I felt pain in my middle because of Trace's finger he inserted in me. I'm still a virgin but I felt na parang hindi na.

That man! Since then ay puro humiliation na lang ang binibigay niya sa akin. And I was dumb since I let him touch me and fingered me out of lust I felt. Actually, the truth is I wanna feel what I felt with him again and to do it all the way but... it's not time yet, I need to execute my plan first. For Carly.

Since nakaalis kami sa Salvacion ay puro plano na ako at nataon naman na pinapadali ni Trace ang pag-execute ko ng plano ko. Sinadya ko na hindi ako tumagal stay sa Baguio dahil nga sa mas gusto ko dito sa Manila as I was waiting for the call from Black Builders, I need to work not only because I am bored nor because I wanna use my profession but the fact that I need this as my way para hindi ako nakukulong sa Baguio.

I purchased this condo unit last month and it became my home here in Metro. Life here in the Philippines is very different from the US but I have been coping since I came here.

Sanay naman ako mag-isa kagaya noong nasa New York ako after Carly became mentally unstable. Si Carly... I felt sorry for enjoying the man na mahal niya but the truth is hindi ko na talaga mapigilan ang pagkagusto ko sa lalaking iyon at minsan I envy Carly. Pero kanina, sa office ni Trace at pinakita ko si Carly sa kaniya ay nasaktan ako na hindi niya man lang nire-recognize si Carly. How could he?! He was so bad.

I dismissed him from my thoughts and I was about to take a shower when my phone's ringing tone broke the silence at mabilis ko naman na sinagot ang tawag. Si Mommy.

"How are you, sweetie?" naiiyak na tanong ni Mommy.

I frowned listening to her voice. Why does she seem sad? The fact that the family's favorite is still mentally unhealthy is really frustrating but we all tried to live with it. Sinanay na namin lahat ang sarili namin na ituring na pagsubok lang ang nangyayari ky Carly, that my sister will soon recover and move on.

"Why are you crying, Mom?" I asked even though parang alam ko na rin ang kasunod na maririnig mula sa kaniya.

"Carly was looking for you and I told her that you were there and you finally found the man she was waiting for. I saw how Carly's eyes brightened, Chloe. My daughter will soon be fine once you convince that man to visit her."

Her daughter.

Mom said that her daughter will soon be fine. I bitterly smiled. I disregard the sudden pain I felt. Hindi ako dapat masaktan ngayon, para kay Carly ay dapat magtulungan talaga kaming lahat. But I wanna sob about how my mother made me feel that there is no one important to her but Carly.

"I–I... I am so happy to hear that, Mommy." I managed to sound happy para magkunwari na okay lang lahat. I have been emotionally damaged since I was a child.

Oh no, Chloe! Don't go there...

Me and Mom talked hanggang sa magpaalam na siya dahil may schedule pa sila sa psychiatrist ni Carly. I looked for Carly's photos on my phone. Napapangiti na lang akong tinitingnan ang mga larawan namin. Mom probably favored my sister that much, but Carly loves me and favored me.

One year lang ang tanda ni Carly sa akin. Carly was the perfect child for our mother. Nang ipinagbuntis ako ni Mommy ay nahirapan ito dahil three months pa lang noon si Carly. It wasn't my fault pero dahil hindi na pwede mag-breastfeed si Mommy dahil sa akin at sa formula milk na lang inasa ang pag-nurture kay Carly. Again, it wasn't my fault pero dahil sa akin kaya naging masakitin si Carly noong baby ito.