TRACE DIMAGIBA (Wild Men Series 1)

S4: 35

CHLOE

Two months have passed... Two months yet still I am fighting with the affliction of what happened. Hindi basta-basta ang pinagdaanan namin kay Louisianna and—

Wait! No! 

No... I should stop there. I should not go there...

I sighed next. The fact that the horror is still in me and I don't know when those nightmares will end should make me consider not to walk back and visit the past. Tapos na 'yon. Ang hindi na lang tapos ay ang trauma ko.

"Lalim na naman ng iniisip mo..." sabi ni Alguien na ikinatingin ko sa kaniya. I was alone earlier, hindi ko napansin na nakalapit na pala siya.

"Yeah..." I agreed. "Some sort of memories."

"Minsan, may mga alaala na kailangan natin i-let go, Chloe."

"We can't let go of memories freely, Alguien. We could live with it but we cannot make it fade away that easily."

"Louisianna took us all in vain... But she could no longer harm us, Chloe."

"I know..."

Totoo na wala nang kayang gawin pa sa amin ang taong patay na, pero ang kamatayan ni Louisianna, ay alaala na hindi ko kayang ilibing sa limot. It was when Trace didn't have a chance to kill Louisianna, as he had no chance... I was there and I was the one who—

"Ano ba ang mahirap kalimutan?" tanong ni Alguien na pumutol sa iniisip ko. "Ang nangyari kay Trace o ang pagpatay mo kay Louisianna?"

I stared at my brother. Ano nga ba? "Both..." I answered, "But honestly it was the latter..."

Alguien sighed. "What you did to Louisianna was understandable on your part, Chloe. Hindi ka sanay sa buhay na mayroon tayo, kaya..." he shrugged, "tinapos mo na siya. You do her a favor, in fact. Masyado ka lang talagang mapagpatawad at maawain."

"And I wonder when killing will become a piece of cake for me." I leaned and closed my eyes. Ayoko man isipin ay naalala ko ulit ang naganap.

That was a month ago, kakalabas ko lang sa hospital. Sinabi ni Alguien na pupunta kami ng Brazil dahil umamin na si Louisianna sa lahat ng nalalaman nito tungkol sa Incognito at iba pa. Reason kaya gusto kaming kausapin ni Ice.

As we went there, I saw how terrifying life for Louisianna was. Napanood ko ang video kung paano siya pinaamin ng mga tauhan ng FSO. No matter how Alguien and Ice told me that Louisianna deserved that... hindi ko pa rin kayang panoorin kung paano siya i-torture.

Louisianna wasn't raped—thanks God that Ice was not fan of abusing woman sexually—but she was mutilated. Napanood ko kung paano siya pinutulan ng mga daliri isa-isa habang pinapaamin sa mga nalalaman niya. After she confessed, her eyes were even removed, ears and tongue also. Sinigurado na wala na siyang magagawa pa na kahit ano laban sa FSO, Excellante, at Foedus.

She was treated like an animal, put in a cage where she was eating and drinking with the dogs. She should be dead sabi pa ni Ice. Hindi lang ini-eliminate agad dahil sa pangako ng una kay Trace... Ang pangako ni Ice na ang asawa ko ang tatapos dito.

Alguien and Ice were the ones who talked and resolved, while I did not give any word to agree on whatever decision they had. No matter what Louisianna did, I can't confirm that she deserves to die.

But why was it me who ended her life?

It was the next morning... I went to visit Lousianna and found her banging her head on the metal bars of the cage. Nang abutan ako nina Ice at Alguien ay nakatitig lang ako kay Louisianna, iniisip kung paano ito aawatin. Ice said Louisianna keeps doing that every morning, that's the cue probably that pushed me to snatch Ice's gun and use it to Louisianna to end her miserable situation.