Blue and White - Levi Fanfiction

Ch. 49 - Ackerman

"Captain," Jean said gently, as though cajoling a wild animal into coming closer, "can you stand?"

"Ah," I said somewhat absently, slowly returning my focus to what was happening around me. With Levi gone for the indeterminate future, I had to pull myself together and lead these kids and remain a pillar for the rest of the regiment. I couldn't leave these guys high and dry because I was unwell; I had to put it aside for the time being to do my job.

"Let's see," I said more surely now, accepting his outstretched hand for help as I got my feet under me. I prepared to get up, and Jean helped pull me to a standing position once I was ready.

Pull myself together, my ass. I pressed a hand to my stomach right away as I was hit with another strong wave of nausea and Jean, ever attentive, stepped closer to me and let me wrap an arm around his shoulder for stability.

"Captain, you should sit..."

"Never mind that," I said. "Do you mind helping me find Erwin?"

"Not at all, captain," he replied right away, thought not easily, for I'm sure he was still worried. Still, he did as I asked, and off we went.

As we walked through the bustling crowd made of Garrison forces (absolutely beaming that they'd done it, they'd helped kill a Titan, and a huge one at that) and the scouts alike (who wore the same grim sort of expression as always, as we knew one thing always led to another so we knew better than to let our guard down - this was all just another day's work), we passed by Levi who was with a squad of scouts easily recognizable.

They were enlistees from about three years after Levi and myself joined; so they were rather young, all soldiers fresh out of training by then, but they were hard-working and dutiful to the core. Levi would have a hard time enlisting a better group of scouts to help him at the moment.

Jean glanced over at him as we passed by on our way to where Erwin was. "You two are good for each other. Forgive me for speaking freely, but it's cute, actually, how he treats you compared to us."

I couldn't help but laugh. "First off, don't apologize for speaking freely with me. In fact, I'd prefer it if you did. I hate the formality that I have to speak with when we go off to meet with other military officers, and more than that, I hate when my subordinates think they have to treat me differently because I'm of a higher rank."

I paused for a moment, letting my words sink in for the boy. My words, of course, would have gone directly against what Shadis would surely have taught him in the Training Corps. He was, obviously, very diligent when it came to standard military practices, and there was no way he wouldn't have taught his cadets to regard all commanding officers with respect, whether they were their own superior or otherwise.

But I'd had this talk before, lots of times. I'd had it with Eld, with Gunther, with Olou, and with Petra, and then briefly with Eren. This was just another. I hoped that these two young men, unlike my first set of subordinates, would not perish under my command, premeditated or not. To have more people die for this banner under my name - I couldn't bear it.

Secondly," I continued, "he's a hard-ass to everyone... but yes, I suppose he does have a soft spot for me. At least, he'd better. But you didn't hear that from me, got it?"

"Hear what, captain?" He asked, playing along already.

I smiled up at him briefly, then looked forward once more to ensure we didn't walk into anyone on our way to Erwin. We finally caught sight of him then, and I immediately caught his eye. Though he was absolutely swarmed by other officers of our own regiment and Garrison soldiers who seemed to be speaking at him all at once, he seemed happy to see me, and perhaps he was.