Blue and White - Levi Fanfiction

Ch. 94 - The Rumbling

"Only her. It's the only way she'll be safe."

"But ma'am... that's absurd."

"It's the only way. They were my mistakes. My shortcomings. It's not her fault. I don't want her living in fear because of me. Please... please. Take her, please, I... I'm begging you. If I'm alone, they'll target me. They only want her because they know it'll hurt me."

"Grandma..."

"I'll... Is there no one else?"

"Please, sir. She's all I have left and I cannot be the reason she..."

"I'll do it."

"Are you... would you really?"

"I will,"

"This is, I think, the best option. I just want her safe."

"I understand," El said. "I'll do whatever I can for her."

I couldn't help but remember that long, nearly-too-distant-to-remember memory of my final day with my grandmother, and my very first time meeting Elwin.

It was bittersweet, really. It was all too easy to draw parallels between the situations I'd once been victim of, and victim to - of leaving those we care about with others for we cannot care for them, not the way they need to be.

"I'm willing to fight for her when her grandmother cannot. She deserves to live a good, long life."

For you, El, I will. And my dear Emiko... you will live a life better than my own. I swear it.

"Amaya, dear, you'll be staying with this soldier for a while, ok? He's kind and strong and he'll take good care of you."

"But why? Why can't I stay with you?"

My confusion then was likely very similar to Emi's own confusion now. And thinking about it, well... were we not the same age, or nearly, during those strange parts of our lives? It was close, at any rate.

"I love you more than you will ever understand. Hopefully one day you'll get why I need to do this."

Strange, that. I felt the same way my grandmother did for me as I do for my own daughter.

"But I don't want to leave you!"

"I know. But we must."

Eventually, at that time, I stopped crying as the only family by blood I had ever known left, comforted for the first time by Elwin Ikeda, the soldier with a golden heart.

And eventually, hopefully, Emi will stop crying as her faulted, flawed mother leaves, comforted by her Uncle Reyes, the soldier who vowed to repay his debts.

Very much like my grandmother, I must leave. I must face my fate alone. I would not endanger her needlessly - but that did not mean that it did not break my heart as I leapt from the window, and as Reyes sprang into action, with Emi securely in his arms as he ran them to the door.

Emiko called out for me, and the sound of her sounding so scared and calling for me broke my heart into pieces. But I steeled my nerves and headed towards the fighting. I was doing this for her. I couldn't lose sight of that. I had to press on.

The building where the fighting was happening was where my comrades were locked up - the large military base, complete with cells lining the bottom floor. And that's what worried me. In the fighting, they'd be forgotten about. By itself, this was fine. What I didn't want was for the  fighting to come to them, and for them to be left defenseless.