Blue and White - Levi Fanfiction

Ch. 69 - Dreaming in Tandem...

It was a strange memory to be reminded of, certainly.

I wasn't sure why I remembered it now, honestly, but as my senses slowly returned to me, as my focus returned as Levi closed the book he'd been reading aloud to us, I realized that somehow during this precious moment we shared, I had revisited that time of my life.

I'd surely have to reread all that I had missed hearing him read, but that would have to wait as he blew the candle out, adjusted the blanket over us, and guided me to lay against him. With a loving kiss to his lips, I bid him a goodnight, lowered my head to rest against his chest, then closed my eyes - though my mind was still racing.

As soon as we had gotten back to the base on that evening - the evening I'd just remembered from that night at the pub so long ago - the first thing Levi had done was run me a bath. He had helped lather me up, washing away all that had happened - or he had tried to, anyway. It was hard at the time not to think about what might have happened. If he hadn't been there, I might have lost myself and killed those two men. I might have jeopardized everything I had worked for up here.

But as it was, he had been there.

As soon as we were out of the bath, he helped me into bed and waited with me until I fell asleep. Once I was (and I didn't know this part until I awoke the next morning and he told me), he went to see Erwin. The commander had still been up, and Levi told him what had happened. Erwin assured Levi he'd look into it.

Only days later, I was formally pardoned of my family's debts.

It was another thing to thank Erwin for, and I had - but I appreciated it now more than ever, for I had a daughter now. At least she would never be subjected to that which she inherited from me when it came to things like that - and with that comforting thought, I fell asleep.

—

My sleep that night was dreamless, and for that I was grateful. Though I did enjoy dreaming, and waking up only to spend the first few minutes of consciousness trying to decipher just what it was exactly my mind had conjured up overnight, dreams had the possibility of becoming nightmares all too quickly. If I didn't dream, I wouldn't run the risk of watching my loved ones die in vivid detail.

My husband wasn't so lucky.

Our sleep had already been light. Emi had only just fallen back asleep, and Levi, as tired as he was, had fortunately fallen back asleep quicker than he usually did. We hadn't exactly gotten to bed at a decent hour, with our bath running especially long and our other chores taking a while to complete even before we got to take our bath.

But I'd been woken up abruptly almost as soon as I'd gotten back to sleep by sudden movement on the bed and what sounded like a strained gasp. By the time I realized I was awake and lifted my head, my heavy eyes opening, Levi was pacing across the room, rubbing his face with his hands as if trying to forcefully remove the image of whatever it was he'd seen.

I sat up, rubbing my eyes to remove the sleep from them. Levi noticed the movement, lowering his hands only enough to peer at me through the darkness, slowing in his step briefly.

"Go back to sleep, Amaya," he said quietly. He said it almost with a pleading tone, and my heart hurt at the sound.

"Come back to bed," I gently requested.

He shook his head - his only reaction to my words - and began to pace once more. I didn't do as he asked, instead sitting silently to watch as he continued to pace, his hands coming back up to grasp his face. I could hear the heavy rain against the windows and the roof, and knowing it'd rain tonight, I'd left one of the bedroom windows open just a tad to let in the fresh air.