The Billionaire Darkness

Chapter Eighty Three

Going to school the following day was a nightmare, both because if my friends knew what happened one of two things would happen. One Paris would go to kill Demetri. Or two I lose my friends because they are disgusted by me.

So here I sat in the passenger seat of my moms car in a turtleneck and highwaisted black jeans to overlap where they could be pulled, and the turtleneck was rather baggy as a way to envelop myself in comfort and safety, since once I get out of this car I would lose that entirely.

"If you need me to come get you at any point today I will" my mom says and I smile at her as she slowed to a stop by the curb of Williamsburg which sat casting a shadow over the front of the street.

"I know, I'll just have to keep a low profile" I say before reaching for the door and getting out of the car onto the sidewalk, and retrieving my bag saying a final goodbye, and telling my mom I loved her as I shut the door.

Walking to the front door I walked through the long empty halls that seemed to magnify the solitude of being here so early, I knew I couldn't go to class, and I couldn't go to the roof, or my corner of the library.

I had nothing and no where to go.

I also knew that Bianca had been on the hunt for me, my saviour was that I had always been around my friends, and or Demetri had kidnapped me off to some far corner of the school.

Left to wander the halls in boredom I paced through the school like the detective in a sleuth novel but instead of clues that would lead to the answer of some count down to a murderer's next victim, it was me looking for something anything at all to do that would occupy my attention.

At some point I walked up to the far side of the school to one of the student lounges where not too many people frequented, and if they did it was to make out, luckily however I wasn't bestowed with having to listen to that this morning let alone see it, as no one else was here.

You'd think a private place in this school would seem like a fun place to go I guess not.

Sitting down I dumped my bag next to me and took out a new notebook and decided to write down a short slightly sloppy version of what had been happening in my life, all the good and the bad, and the longer I wrote the more I realized just how much the bad had filled my life without me noticing it this year. Piece by piece it had crept in and taken over each aspect. 

I had been so blind to it entering too. I was blinded by the concept of anyone loving me and when Demetri gave me that chance I was faced with so much compassion but the veil shifted, the screen slipped and I was shown who he really was, and I had no one to counter that, every guy I'd interacted with had tried to do something to me of some malicious intent.

I envied Paris and Angela and their love, how well it fitted together, and how happy they both looked I saw them as I glanced up to stretch my neck, walking by laughing, and even if it brought a smile to my lips it was one of happiness and deep seeded pain.

Why was I hurt like this?

Why did it have to be like this?

Letting out a sigh I stared back down at the pages in front of me as I started to sketch a picture a mirror of how things were vs what they were now. I would admit it was a good drawing not perfect but I suppose that was the beauty of the distortion of it all, it was a false truth I'd persuaded myself to believe that it was all normal but how was I supposed to leave if I couldn't find a way to do that to any degree without having it back fire or end up with the people I cared about getting hurt.

I wanted out so badly and yet every time I breathed air that was supposed to travel through my body to it's deepest tissues might as well have been poison, it would have been more pleasant then hearing people make comments about how meek I was, or the looks I got when I passed a particular group of senior boys.

Demetri never even bothered to deter them, as if it were some test to see if I would entertain other guys. I was done being treated as a game, but I was also trapped as a piece on a board I that was a maze to me, and my abusive boyfriend was the one puppeteering everything.

Speaking of which I watched his silver Camaro park in the lot and him get out before locking the vehicle over his shoulder as he walked off towards the school's entrance.

I hoped to avoid him though I also knew that I wouldn't get the chance to do that and if anything I would still have to wait months to get away from him, as even if I asked for a restraining order the police would likely take it as just some teenage girl being overdramatic about what he ex did to her.

A few moments later he rounded the corner likely having seen me through the window and walked over to me with an aura of control and intimidation, not the kind that normally people would be drawn to to find comfort and stability, the far opposition of those traits were embodied here.

"Oli" he says.

"Demetri" I reply closing the book and slipping it back into my bag while refusing to meet his eyes, knowing he'd likely have some scornful look in his eyes. Some form of disgust for what I was doing, or what I looked like, or even how I had dressed that wasn't a new one but it was a progressed one.

"I need to talk to you" he says.

"About what, raping me, even though my virginity wasn't yours to take from me" I snap and he takes a step back at the ferocity of my words.

"Will you shut up, or do you want me to do it again" he shoots back at the jarring memory shot through me like a rocket, and this time it was me that shrunk away.

"Exactly, now you listen, you will not ever tell your friends what happened last night, and if you do I'm sure I could make the people you care about disappear. Unless of course you want to test that" he muses a cruel smile playing on his lips.

"No" I grit politely.

"Good girl now you should probably go to class" he says the crude smile I would love to slap off his face remaining there taunting me as I walked off and stared up at the ceiling for a split second.

I want this all to end soon.

I then spent the rest of the day avoiding both my friends by arriving several minutes late or on the bell for the rest of the day, using the excuse of it being my time of the month, along with Demetri who every time I spotted I hid lower in the crowds of people through the halls or hid in the bathroom to avoid him.

As the bell rang I was probably the first one out of the building practically shooting out of the door and off towards the Hudson River which is the complete opposite of where I typically went when the bell rang out so I guess I was providing myself with time.

The walk was probably the only peace I got throughout my entire day, the dead trees slowly regaining the life that was torn from them over the winter months, the cold and dead where all of my problems began and now the bright sun and warmth that I hoped my life would get better in. But that wasn't likely to happen. I knew people weren't capable of change patterns repeated and it was always obvious to tell which people had habits and which people simply made themselves seem terrible when they weren't.

Our school had a kid like that who no one liked, no one talked to, no one even bothered to acknowledge him, he had killed himself from the constant reticule he faced while walking through the halls. I always wondered what he had been hiding what had been beneath his hood, and behind the blue eyes he looked at everyone with. I wondered what he wanted to become and if he had dreams what they would have looked like if he got the chance to do them.

I related to him feeling alone, and without a place that seemed welcoming where I spent most of my day, the only difference was that I had people who blocked me from ever going down the same path, and for that I was grateful. However I just wanted the coldness that I felt like a blistering wind through my life, to be replaced by happiness.

But I could only dream.     

    
I'm not particularly proud that this chapter is this short, so I apologize and move on. Leave comments, also, vote, and share. Anyways 

Peace✌