What I think about life.

Love

After work, Laila and Holly are going shopping together at the mall. Laila is responsible for the office's Hari Raya(eid) celebration. She bring along her assistant -to not only help her with the planning but she needs Holly's eye on the decorations. She has a knack for arts and design. They had their iftar(break of fast) at a restaurant in the mall. Instead of having a Ramadan buffet, which is typically enjoyed by the locals, Laila had a nice plate of meatball spaghetti while Holly enjoyed her fried noodles.

They discussed the raya celebration plan over dinner when suddenly Laila saw her ex. She tried to make herself inconspicuous. He was with a woman her age and a toddler in a stroller. They just went out of the restaurant. She didn't see him earlier. She wonder if he saw her earlier.

Thankfully, Holly didn't see the horror in Laila's face. They pray their Maghreb and Isyak prayer at the prayer room before stopping by at a famous chain coffee shop. They hang out and rest their tired body at the coffee shop. Half and hour of discussing about work, they are definitely caffeinated and ready to do their shopping.

Laila purposely to do it ahead of time. She don't want to do a last minute job and go berserk again when things get overwhelmed. She can't take her mind off her ex for a moment. He looks good - and happy. She secretly feel a little bit bitter about how they ended their relationship but part of her is happy to see that he finally has a little family of his own. She suddenly think of Azhar and how it would feel like to celebrate Ramadan and eid together as a family.

It will definitely feel like a dream. She knows because everyone keeps telling her that.

And she knows.

***

They go to Bazaar Ramadan together to buy some food for their iftar. Laila is still in her baju kurung. She go straight to the bazaar from work. They have variety of food at the bazaar. She buy just enough for her and her family. She buy the famous Ayam Percik, grilled fish, Lamb Briyani rice, Cendol and plenty of delicious dessert.

She look at Azhar who is standing next to her and suddenly remember her ex again. She shakes off the thought and distract herself with more food that the bazaar gets to offer.

***

She gather with her whole family that evening. Her parents, her younger sister and two older brothers with their family - all sitting down at the huge dining table in the dining room. The food that she bought earlier together with the others' filled up the entire table. The sound of her chaotic family fills up the room; her mother who has a little fight with her father, her sister who are talking with her brothers and their wives, and the endless complaints from her hungry nephews and nieces.

It is definitely chaotic but it definitely is worth it.