Elevator love merder

Washing away Ellis Grey

-So..Are you ready? - he asked me, while he was standing behind me. I had the bag in my hands, and we were in the scrub room of OR 1. The most important OR, in Seattle Grace hospital. I nodded, and took a handful of ashes out of the bag, and i opened the tap with my other. I let the water wash away the first amount. I was thinking of her, when the door of the scrub-room opened, and i saw Richard standing there.
-Someone paged me here, when there is no surgeries going on! - His brows furrowed when he saw us.
-What the hell are you doing here? This is a sterile environment! For scrubbing in!
-I paged you. This is - i raised my hand.
-My mother. And i thought you might want to join...- i sighed.
-Oh...That's very...thoughtful of you. - his voice melted, and he came a step closer.
-This is where she'd want to be. - i let the water wash it my off my hand.
-Should we say a prayer? - he asked.
-She didn't truly believe in anything. - i answered.
-Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. - he said, as i gave him some space, and let him take a handful put of the bag. This is how it was supposed to happen. She loved the hospital, and surgery. More than anything probably. And he loved Richard. And me. Sometimes i felt like she did. But this time, i was sure that this was the right decision. As i was standing there with Richard, washing off her ashes, and Derek was keeping me together, by holding my hip, and sometimes whispering a word to me, i knew it. This is what she would've wanted. Be here forever. In the best OR of the hospital. She belonged here. When the little plastic bag became empty, Richard turned to me.
-Thank you. For calling me.
-No need. You were a big part of her life. And this was right.
-Yeah. - he sat down onto the bench.
-Do you want to stay for a bit? - Derek asked me.
-I'm sorry. You should go home, if you - i started, but he interrupted, by sitting down onto the bench, pulling me with him. He was so....understanding. But this time, i kept thinking of my mother. I said my goodbyes. I wasn't mad at her anymore. For the things she did in the past, that made my life harder. I was fine with her. I relived some of my memories. From kindergarten, to today. I didn't know how much time had passed, when i finally stood up.
-We can go now. Thank you. - i hugged Derek once.
-Okay. Do you need to change? - he asked me as i was still half in scrubs, half in jeans.
-Yeah.
-Good night Richard! - i nodded.
-Chief. - Derek said his goodbye to.
-Good night Meredith. Shepherd. - he answered, as we left him in there.
We took the turn to the resident locker room, and i changed into my clothes, and grabbed my purse. I took a look at the clock which was ticking on the wall over the door. Nearly half past eleven.
-Derek.
-Hm?
-Thank you. For everything. I seriously don't know how i would've survived this day without you. You've helped me a lot. You help me a lot every day. Just i need you to know that...I'm grateful. Really. And i love you.
-I love you too. - he answered, and i gave him a short kiss.

When we fell into bed, after a shower, in clean pajamas, exhausted, it was approximately one am. When i felt the familiar pull make me close my eyes, between Derek's arms, i felt safe, and happily gave in. I knew he was also exhausted from his earlier morning shift, and it warmed my heart that he still stayed with me today. He never let go of me. I knew as soon as he closed his eyes, he fell into sleep, just as me. But i also knew i wanted to give him something special too. So i reminded myself not to forget about tomorrow. Because something special was definitely was going to be about tomorrow...