i don't mind :: c.h

19: Always

Calum Hood

"No! He doesn't love me anymore." I heared Fiona's voice. She was with a girl. She was with Ally.

I felt the need to talk to Fiona until Ally was gone. She walked home with a smile on her face. I missed her. I missed seeing her with that cute smile I admired since the day we were on her flat.

I walked my way up to Fiona. She's still the girl I first fell inlove with. Her features, her smile, her hair. Everything. I admired her everyday.

I covered her eyes from behind. "What the fuck! Pull away before I call the police!" she screamed. I laughed at her crankiness. She's still the same. "Chill, Fio! It's just me." I sat beside her. She was shocked at the sight of me sitting beside her. "What's with me?" I asked. If you could see her face, I don't know if you'll be laughing or rolling over the cliff. "Oh, h-hey Cal! I didn't knew you are actually h-here." she's stuttering. I never thought she could stutter right in front of me. I knew her for like, forever. She's vocal with her feelings. I never knew she was like this, stuttering.

"I was walking my way here when I saw you with Ally. I noticed you, because you are wearing my shirt." she looked at her shirt and she laughed. "I'm sorry. Want me to give it back?" she said. I jumped a little with what she had said. "Heck no! Keep it. As a remembrance." I just said.

"So, how are you doing?" Fiona said, looking up to me, smiling. Her smile will be death of me. "I'm doing good. We have a two-month break. I think it's a good start, I saw you." I smiled at the irony making me look at her. "Such a cheesy puppy, eh?" she pinched my cheeks. It was good to see her like this again. Free. She was perfect in every way she does.

"Fiona, let me make it up to you. I'm so-" she cut me off with a kiss. I was shocked with her move. "Don't tell that sorry word again, Calum. I really don't want you blabbering the past." she said. "Then, why did you tell it to Ally?" she looked at me with a confused face. "Y-you saw us here?" Fiona said. I smiled. "Yeah. I'm kind of a uh-stalker you know."

This moment was different from before. I know it has been three years, but I need to tell Fiona my feelings. I need to stand up for myself. "Fiona," I faced her. She was smiling up to me. "I still l-love you. I know it's been three years. But, but this feeling in my heart. It's been here since you left me. It still burns, the fire that we lighted up together. It's kind of weird, b-but, no. I still love you, Fiona." All I knew that I was crying when I said those words. It struck my heart like a knife. "Calum," she cupped my face. "I know that it's been three, memorable years. But, you need to let go of me, Calum. I know it's hard but you really need to-"

I cut her off. This was never my thing, cutting someone off. "What? I need to throw those three fucking years just like what you did? God, Fiona! How can you even say that? I loved you first! I made you special, then you just want me to th-throw it?" I was crying. Wow, Calum. You fucking cried in front of a girl. "N-no." she sobbed, she was also crying when I let all my pain out of me. "I still love you, either. B-but, I don't have the reason to love you anymore. You can love someone better than me!" she said. "But, you're the best for me!" I shouted. I never thought that this would be hard than I ever expected.

"Nothing in this world is the best, babe." she muttered. The sound of babe was still music to my ears right then and there. "You can find someone much better than me. You can make someone happier, not me. You can put effort on someone who truly loves you. I just threw away our memories, why would you even tell me I'm the best?" she wiped a tear off of her face and she breathed. "Calum, you're the best thing that ever happened to me. I always treasured our time together. I kept our three, lovely years. It was amazing." she stopped.

"But, all things come to an end." Fiona cried. "I'm not crying because of the fact that I'm saying all of this. But, I'm crying because for a small span of time, you learned how to treasure things that you thought were not valuable. You learned to treasure time. And, I am so thankful that you learned that from, me." Fiona stated. Her words were full of meaning. It made me realize that we were not meant to be really together.

Seeing her like this was not a good scene. I felt the need to hug her. So, I did. She hugged me back. Soothing her back and kissing the top of her head was one of her favorite things that she loved me to do. And so I did. She laughed. "You really didn't forget those sweet things I really love, do you?" she smiled at me. This was perfect. "Of course. I will never forget that."

Fiona stood up from where we were sitting. She looked at her clock. "Oh, it's 12:00 A.M already. I need to get going." she smiled, helping me to get up. "Do you want me to get you home?" I offered. I don't want her to go home alone at this kind of time. And it's really dark. Fiona suddenly laughed. "Cal, my house is literally beside the park. You don't need to worry about me seriously." I almost forgot, she was near here. "Oh, shit. I forgot. I'm so-ugh." she laughed. "You're sorry, I get it."

"So, this is goodbye for now?" she cut off the silence. "Not the literal goodbye, we can still be friends right?" she said. I smiled at her. "Of course, Fio. We can. So," I breathed. "You need to get going, it's really getting late." She hugged me for a long time, then she pulled away. "Good night, Cal. Be safe on your way home." she smiled, and then walked away.

After she walked away, I whispered to the air.

"Thank you for making me realize things, Fiona. You'll always be the best for me.." I paused.

"Always.."