i don't mind :: c.h

26: Never

Calum Hood

There are still no signs of Ally showing up. Texts, calls, Skyping. No signs.

I really miss her. So much.

I went to our hotel right after I went to my family's house here. It wasn't that far. I still used my car anyways.

I was welcomed with the warm smile of the hotel staff. They were caring and all out for us since we got here.

As I walk out of the elevator, I saw Luke leaning through his hotel room. I waved at him and ran fast toward me. I was so shocked because his face was literally looking concerned and nervous.

"Hey, mate. What's with your face? You looked like you fucked someone!" I laughed. He glared at me. "Ally's here."

The sound of her name startled me and made me ran through Luke's door. It was locked. "Why is it locked?" I was getting nervous by the time passes. "Steph made me go out. They have serious talks about Ally's past. I saw her crying after I went down to fetch her. It's been weeks since we didn't saw her and we just planned to make her go here." Luke said with a sad smile. "I'm worried for her, Cal. When I saw her, she was out of words. I can't help seeing her crying, too. She's a good friend."

I was not furious about Luke seeing him the first. I felt guilty that I wasn't the one who saw her crying at the first place. I felt guilty for not knowing where she is at the first place.

I felt guilty because I wasn't here when she needed me the most.

Guilt. That's what runs into my veins. It looks like it's all gonna pop out. Luke snapped at me, taking me back to reality. "Steph texted me. We can go inside now." he said, patting me at the back. "No. You should go first. I don't want her to walk away from me again when she saw me."

Instead of Luke going inside. He sat at the carpeted floor. "What are you doing, Hemmings?" he patted the side making me sit. I do as what he gestured. "I don't want to interrupt them. I wanted to tell you this, since Steph said this to me when Ally was.. you know. She harmed herself." Luke started to tell me a story.

A story from Ally's past.

Luke told it to me. Detailed and everything. From the day she walks home, the park and to her flat. Until the time that she saw that Axel again.

That's why she mumbled that name when she was sleeping at the music room. It was her past. I will never let that happen to us. Never.

Luke decided to head back to his room and fetch Steph so that me and Ally could talk. I was nervous. I keep on walking back and forth, playing with my fingers. Everything. Why do I feel this way whenever I would talk to her?

After a few minutes of waiting, Steph and Luke went out of the hotel room. Steph enveloped me in a hug, then motioned me to be with them after we talked. I said a quick yes then ran to the room.

As I hold on to the door knob, I felt the chills run down my spine.

Am I ready to see her?

Am I okay?

Calum, just go inside. Ally won't bite. You love her, okay?

So many questions run through my head. I didn't know I was slowly opening the door.

I walked into the dark room, only the bed side lamp was the source of light.

I saw Ally, crying at the bed.

"A-Ally?" I muttered with a soft voice. Maybe if I speak so loud, she'll startle at this moment.

"C-Calum? I-is that you?" she said, her voice cracked. I really want to hug her right then and there. But, what happens next was the one I didn't expect to be.

We were kissing. Tears are still falling down her face when we kissed. It was passionate. It was intense. Everytime we kiss back, I felt the need to kiss her even more. I needed her. She's my strength.

I hugged her so tight when she pulled away from the kiss. I missed her lips on mine. I missed how she touches my neck softly. I miss her giggles. I just simply miss her.

"Why are you here?" Ally said. We flopped down at the bed, together. This is what I need. "I was here to visit Luke. But, then. He said that you were here, so. I didn't hesitate to talk to you. It was hell without you, babe. I really missed you." I'm telling you, the feeling is so real. "And," I breathed. "Luke told me your past about.. Axel."

She looked at me with a shocked face. "Y-you k-know? I-I mean, Luke knows?" she said. I quickly nodded. "Steph told her what you had gone through the days with him. He is so stupid!" I sounded mad over there. "I mean, Ally, I didn't mean to-" She cut me off. "No, it's okay. You can say anything you want, baby. I really don't care about him anymore."

The nickname she gave me made the butterflies inside my head to flutter. It was a great feeling talking to her again.

It was a great feeling I could wrap her around me.

I sighed heavily, making her look at me. "I'm so sorry, Ally." I started. "From what?" She had a pained expression in her face. "For everything. Since the day you just shoved me away, I realized things. You made me realize things. I was so stupid for no-" With that, she cut me off.

"Please don't say you're stupid. It also hurts to see the one you love blaming himself for my own sake." Ally said.

Those words. It really made me feel zo secured. I was on cloud nine.

"I got this on my doorstep.."

She raised the voice recorder I left the day my mind was out of the world.

"Y-you really brought this here?" I said to her. She was smiling now. I never felt so okay when the girl you love actually smiles in front of you, knowing that you maybe the reason for it. She sighed. "Of course, I won't let this alone at my flat because, you know, I don't want this baby to feel left out. The words inside here was so special, it made me feel so loved." When she said those words, I was blushing all through out. She made me feel special.

"Calum, I just want to tell you what's inside my head." Oh, shit. Will she tell me that she hate me? Will she walk away? Will she go back to that stupid Axel? Questions here, questions there. I can't understand this. I need to stop askimg myself. I need to hear her out. "What is it? Tell me." I looked down at her. She was smiling at me.

"I want you to come with me,

let's go and talk to Axel before anything wrong comes in."