An Unfortunate Mix-Up ✔️

Chapter 35: Erin

Jay lays there, focused on relaxing, knowing any relief from the pain that threatened to rip through him multiple times a day was certainly welcome. He already could not wait for it to be over, to see the rest of the wires ripped away, and escape this hospital setting.

Believe it or not, this was probably his longest stay within these four walls - and that was saying a lot considering everything he had been through. 

Though lying there, he couldn't help but feel his mind wander, a mixture of thoughts flashing through his mind. Would Alex take his advice? Would everything be okay there? What if he had changed things forever for him, and not in a good way? Would he ever get over what he was experiencing? Were these going to become pains that he'd experience all the time? How was he supposed to do his job? What did life look like once he stepped outside these four walls as there were options? 

There was also one topic he had reluctently dropped, scared of what could possibly be the news that came from it. Normally, everyone was straight up in updating each other on the situation across the board. So where was the update on Erin? Why hadn't anyone said anything? Was it news that he shouldn't bear to hear? 

"Hank..." He says catching the Sargent's attention as he stood at the end of the room, leaning back against the wall. He had come to visit, just like he had since Jay woken up, at least spending a couple hours each day. It puzzled Jay as to why, as that wasn't like Hank, but there were a lot of time to ask those questions later. "Erin..."

"She's okay Jay," Hank simply replies, taking a deep breath as he knew that wouldn't be enough for the detective before him. He had tried in the past to hide details, and it seemed no matter what Jay got through to them. "I got your warning, and I immediately called Oliv-"

"Benson?" Hank smiles with a nod of the head, only to get a smile in return. Jay knew of the relationship Erin and Olivia formed quickly through the brief time the two paired up together to work a couple cases. It was comforting to know she was with someone familiar, rather than the original stranger that he couldn't even think of their name now. 

"She's working on the Special Victims Unit with her now. I figured she'd be the best person to call because she's been there, knows the feeling, and I would trust her with my life if I had to." Jay wasn't about to deny that, having been impressed in the short time he had gotten to work with Olivia. "Olivia hasn't gotten back to me with anything yet, as to any appearance by Derek anywhere. He hasn't approached Erin, reached out to her, touched her, anything. Olivia told me the minute something happened - if it does, she'd get back to me." 

"So he's still out there?!?" Jay felt himself beginning to panic, knowing a group of people who had just left the hospital earlier that day, one of those who had been victim to the original attack. "Why weren't we made aware of that? I mean, I feel that Alex has a right to kno-"

"How about Derek Keyes was apprehended - wait, let me rephrase that. He was shot in the head, single bullet above the left eye, killing him as he tried to leave the state by state police. That's why I haven't been worried, or said anything. If there was a threat, believe me, I would not hold back and make sure both you and Alex were aware." Jay instantly relaxes, taking a series of deep breathes as he rests his head against the pillow. That was a fear he didn't need to be feeling right now on top of everything. "Is there anything else you would like to know?" 

"No..." Jay continues taking his series of deep breathes, feeling a shooting pain up the middle of his back. He clenches his teeth together, shutting his eyes, resisting every urge to react as his hand turns into an immediate fist, as if channeling out the energy that way. 

"Jay?" Hank walks over, placing his hand on top of Jay's, clutching it as he looks at the young man before him. "Breathe...." Jay keeps his focus on the series of deep breaths, his fist growing tighter if even possible. "Jay..."

"Fuck! It hurts!" He couldn't resist any longer, feeling his body twitch slightly as he fought against it, only increasing the shooting pain sensation. He only allows his fist to open enough to clutch the morphine drip, squeezing it for what its worth. 

"Just relax..." Hank clutches Jay's hand after he is done squeezing, focusing on his eyes. "I've got you. Just breathe.." Jay nods his head, following the instruction as he slowly feels the pain subside, his tense behavior relaxing as he glances over at his boss. "Are you okay?" 

"Yeah." He watches as Hank slowly lets go of his hand, feeling a calmness come over him as he laid there quietly, back to listening to the steady beeps of the monitors around him. "I just want those pains to go away. I just..." He freezes, knowing he couldn't go on to say more. 

"Just breathe, focus on keeping yourself relaxed, and moving forward. And remember to follow that exact advice that you gave Alex." Jay nods his head, knowing against every bit of him that wanted, he was going to be forced to follow through if he wanted to move forward. 

After all, the nightmares that plagued him at night would not go away if he didn't.