Died enough for You [Joel Hokka FF] (English)

To a Razor

With the time that we're sitting in the boys' tent the consume of alcohol gets more. The first "drink the beer in one go competitions" were held between Joel and Joonas, in the second round Niko joined in and I also got persuaded to do one against Joonas. I lost those by a lot but it wasn't about winning anyway. At least not for me, the blond curly guitar player was as excited about his win as if he would have won the lottery.

After some time I feel like I'm with normal human beings again as the boys put on their jumpers aswell. Now I don't feel like a German potato any longer that can't handle any coldness. Well, at least nearly, because when I look at the guy opposite me I keep getting a shiver. Because the Finn is still sitting at the table in his tshirt and is talking to the others.

Only a couple of times he notices me staring at him but when he does I can't seem to figure out what his facial expression means. For one he looks emotionless but on the other hand I see a sort of grin on his face which doesn't seem happy nor rude.

„As Hilja you've got your guitar with you how do you feel about a little concert for us.", Niko suggests and points to my guitar which is leaning onto the table. „As the boys didn't seem to have noticed you on stage.", he adds to give me less reasons against and more reasons for a little concert. „If I say no now it probably won't change a thing, will it?". He quickly shakes his head which makes his long brown hair fly through the wind. With that he confirms my statement which is why I don't even start to discuss and grab my guitar into my hand and take my plectrum out of my back pocket.

„What do you want me to play?", I ask the group as I have absolutely no clue what I should play. „Can you play any of our songs?", Joonas asks to which I nod. „Well then play one of them.", Olli agrees to the idea the guitar player had. „Which one?", the boys were not expecting that question as I can see clearly in their faces. „How about 'Over my dead Body'", Joel suggests as the first one.

In his face I can see a sort of challenging look. I know that that is one of Joel's favourite songs which is why he has high expectations for me playing this song. I give him a short smile to show him I accept the challenge and start the first notes of the song.

It doesn't take long until I pull all of them into a kind of trance with my guitar and my voice and they join in by drumming on the table or some background voices for the lyrics. All of them, except for Joel.

He continues to sit on the bench barely moving at all and looking at me with his light blue eyes. But as I said, barely moving. Even though he is doing it sneakily and quiet I notice how he moves his foot in the rhythm. He didn't want to show it but he also liked my little concert.

After the last notes I look directly at him and pull up one of my eyebrows a little and grin in a way to show him that I know exactly that I won his little challenge.

„Wow, so you definitely didn't loose your talent.", Joonas is happy and starts applauding. The other four also clap which makes me look down a little ashamed. „If you say so.", I whisper and put one of my blond curls behind my ear.

The time in which we talk about literally everything continues going by as it did before and my bladder starts to make itself noticeable. I whisper to Niko asking where I could find the toilet to which he gets up and brings me there.

We go into the tour bus together. Immediately I breath in the warm, stuffy air that let's le breath out a few times. „Sorry for the air in here.", Niko apologies himself but I just give him a slight wave. „What are you talking about? There's nothing to say sorry for. It smelled the same in our tour bus aswell.".

Niko brings me past the beds and to a closed door. „So, this is it. I guess you're able to find your way back?" – „Of course, thanks, Niko.", I thank him and disappear onto the toilet.