I Told The Stars About You

1. The Sister I Never Had

"Georgia it's okay." I said as I hugged my best friend. She sobbed in my arms like she never did before. She was holding me tightly, not wanting to let go.
"It's not. I don't want you to go because of their fault, it's not fair."
Their fault. Them. The worst part of all this is that wherever I go, they will always be there, unfortunately.
Those scars would never disappear, I was conscious about it, but at the moment, moving on and making a fresh start in another place sounded like the best option. Leaving all my dark past and bad memories in Manchester, and restart my life in London, even though I knew that my past would chase me during all my life.
"I'll miss you so much" I kissed the top of her head.
"I'll miss you too, Al"

Georgia Stanway is my best friend. Actually, I don't know if I would still be here if I didn't meet her. She was my world, she gave me all the love I was never given, and I was extremely thankful for that.

"I'll visit once a month at least" I stroked her hair. She just nodded, not wanting to believe I was leaving.
"Did you tell the others?" She said, pulling away from the hug to sit in the sofa.
I just shook my head.
"When are you going to, then?" Georgia asked, I really didn't know.
"I don't really know, to be honest"

After having dinner with Georgia, I left to go home. Home?
Most people say that home is a place where you feel comfortable, protected, and loved. Unfortunately, I wasn't lucky enough to have these things.

30/4/2005

I was doing my homework in my room.
My room was small, I had a bed, a little closet, a table, a chair and a little box in which I had my football boots and my little shin pads. It was always tidied up, and I didn't have any mess of toys around as the other kids. My parents always told me since I was just a kid to grow up.
As I was writing some notes in my book, my bedroom door flung open.
"Alex" My dad said in a stern voice.
"Hi dad, what's up?" I was so innocent. I could talk to both my parents as the happiest person in the world, even knowing that they could hit me just a second after.
He came to me and leaned in the wall of my room.
"We got a call from your school."
"What did they say?" I asked confused.
"That doesn't matter, you know what we were talking about with mum last week?" I nodded.
"Then, why didn't you hide those fucking bruises?!" He hit the wall with his fist.
"I tried." I said, looking at the floor.
"From now on, you will study at home. No school." He said coldly.
"But what about my friends?"
"They don't care about you."
"They do! And my teacher Olivia says that it's important to have friends, they make you happy." I said trying to convince my dad.
"Olivia is a bitch!" My dad shouted.
"What does that mean, dad?"
My dad buried his hands in his face, his patience was about to run out.
"Dad?"
"What does it mean?"
"Dad?"
All I can remember after that words is pain. A lot of pain.

I was in the parking lots of the training grounds, after saying goodbye to everyone.
Georgia was with me, she would come with me to London and stay one night with me.
"Let's go" I told her. She nodded silently and started walking to my car.
"Are you sure you have everything?" Georgia asked.
"Yes, I'm 100% sure, don't worry G. We are going home before leaving tho."
"Okay"

I drove to my house, to do a last check.
"Al, it's already dark, and we have a 4-hour drive." Georgia said while I opened the door.
I just nodded, I was trying not to cry, honestly.
Leaving your childhood city wasn't easy, even though all the problems and horrible memories I had in it.
It felt like it was not the right thing to do.
I walked through my small house, trying to picture it in my mind, I didn't want to forget where I came from.
Suddenly, I felt Georgia wrapping her arms around my neck, she was behind me.
"What's going inside that little head of yours?" Georgia said kissing the top of my head. God, I love her so much, she was like the big sister I never had.
"Nothing." I shook my head. "Nothing" I turned around and hugged her.
"You know, Alex, sometimes, people can be weak. Don't hide it, it's not worth it. I'll always stay by your side no matter what, know that, right?" Georgia said while I was holding back tears. I didn't want to let go. I tightened my grip, letting out a small sob.
"Don't hide it, it's just me." Georgia said seconds before I broke up in her arms.
She didn't say anything. She just kept hugging me, drawing shapes in my back with her fingers.
"I can't do this"
"G, I can't." I said.
"Hey, look at me." She lifted up my chin, so I could look at her in the eyes.
"Of course you can't do this. But, we do. I won't let go."

"Ready to go?" Georgia asked.
"Yeah" I said while looking thorough the window to my house.
Georgia said she would drive as I was pretty tired and I had mixed feelings.
She put on a podcast, while I was trying not to fall asleep.
Slowly, my eyes became heavier and heavier...

Once Georgia stopped in a traffic light, she looked at me.
"Sleep tight" She gently grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

(The podcast Georgia was listening at)

- Tell us your experience, if you don't mind of course, how do you feel about it?

- Well, I lost him when we were still pretty young. I miss him so much. Everything I do, is for him. Sometimes I wish I could go back only for a minute to talk to him for the very last time.

- What is your advice for people, based on your experience?

- Well, if you have someone who you really love alive, you aren't conscious of how would you feel if that person was not with you anymore. Spend time with your loved ones, and enjoy life with them. Time flies.