Resurgent~ Back again

Chapter 64

Tobias POV
After Caleb shared the information with us, I got up and followed him out. I felt bad for leaving Tris alone, but I need to speak to him about something. "Caleb. Hold up." I say and he stops. We're in the middle of the hallway at the moment, luckily no ones around.

"I wanted to ask you about something." I tell him. "Alright." He says. I can tell he's not a huge fan of me, but I'm really no one of his either. "What are the chances of Tris getting pregnant again?" I ask in a low voice. I know Tris can't hear us but I still feel that I should keep my voice down.

Caleb sighs and that doesn't make me real hopeful. "The chances are very low." He says and I nod sadly. "I mean it would be almost impossible for her to carry another child, we don't know what could happen." He says and my tears are pushing to come out. "So you don't think there's any way?" I ask hoping for some sort of good news.

His face droops more, "I just don't think that there is. I'm sorry Four. For both of you." He tells me and leaves me in the bright white hallway.

I slide down against the wall and bring my knees to my chest. The tears come now, they roll freely down my face. Shedding any piece of hope left in me, any faith that it will be okay.

I wanted a family with Tris, we both wanted one. I am still very thankful that we have Luca, that we still have a child to care for. But it's not the same as having your own, going through the experiences.

Then it hits me that I have to tell Tris all this, I have to be the one to break her heart. I close my eyes hoping that all this is a dream and I'll wake up in my bed, next to a pregnant Tris. Our life perfect once again.

But when I open them, I'm still in the same hospital hallway, the same antiseptic smell. The same pain in my heart, the same tears on my skin, the same feeling of having something ripped from us. I finally bring myself to stand, and brush my hands on my pants. Then head back to Tris's room.

I open her door and she's asleep, I walk over and sit in the chair by her bed. I wished that I could be sitting here as she sleeps after giving birth to our little one. Our baby held safely in my arms as their mother rests.

But I sit here, to help bring safety and love to Tris. I look at her, her hair everywhere but still making her beautiful. Her face stained with tears, I bend down and kiss her forehead. As I do, I feel her small arms wrap around my neck. I stay there, feeling her warmth and love soaring through me.

I lean back into the chair, letting her arms go. "Hey, How ya doing?" I ask her and reach to grasp her hands in mine. "Alright." She says and I know she's trying to be brave for me.

"Sweetheart, you can let the walls down if you want. It's only me here." I tell her. That's when she crumbles, tears pouring out. "I'm sorry." She says and if she were talking about the baby, I'd be upset for her blaming herself. But I know she's talking about the tears.

"Don't apologize. Let it all out." I tell her honestly. "What were you talking about with Caleb?" She asks me looking up into my eyes. That burns me more, knowing that I have to break the news to her, and destroy the little hope she has left.

"I wanted to know what our chances were that we could conceive again." I start. I can tell she's perked up a bit, hoping that good news will come from my mouth. But there won't be any.

"He said that, he said that it's highly unlikely." I tell her and she just stares at me. She doesn't move, nor speak, no nothing.

"Tris?" I ask actually getting concerned at this moment. She turns her head away from me, and stares right straight in front of her. "Tris??" I ask again hoping for an answer this time around.

"We're never going to have a family." She states and it almost sounds robotic the way she answers. "What?" I say kind of in disbelief of what she just said.

"Tris, we'll have a family. I mean we already are!" I say. "Me, you, luca." I tell her. "We're going to have a baby Tris." I tell her and I actually believe the words that came out. "We're gonna have a mini Tris running around, driving us nuts as she colors all over the walls." I tell her starting to laugh at the image in my mind.

At this point she's looking at me, tears falling. But they don't match the expression on her face, she looks happy. I haven't seen her smile like that in days, and especially with what we're going through.

"Thank you." I mumbles. "Don't thank me. I'm just telling you the truth." I tell her. "Trying to be candor huh?" She asks and giggles. The giggle I've missed, the giggle I didn't know if I'd get back or not.

"I love you." I tell her. "I love you too." She tells me. And this is the truth.