Resurgent~ Back again

Chapter 90

Tris POV
"She'll be fine Tobias, and plus I think she'd be in more danger if she went with you and the guys." I tell Tobias who's being a worrisome parent, in the middle of the doorway on his way out.

It's been about four months since Miracle was born and I have to say she's an amazing baby. Hardly fusses, she cries but Tobias has this power of calming her down- it's incredible. She's gotten more features and knows how to crawl now. And with every passing day, she looks like Tobias more and more.

"I know, I just..." Tobias tries to argue back but fails.

Tomorrow is our wedding day finally, and surprisingly enough we'll be getting married on the same date he proposed to me. One year engagement and getting married the same date. We hadn't planned it like that, it just happened.

So tonight, we're having our bachelor and bachelorette parties. Which means I won't get to see him until tomorrow. I'm taking Mira for the night and then Chris is going to take Mira to Tobias in the morning.

I would do it but Chris won't let me- something about how the bride can't see the groom or something like that. I chose to zone out on that part.

"I'll miss you." I tell him.

"I'll miss you too love, but tomorrow it's all about us." He says kissing me lightly.

He told me that he's already planned the honeymoon, taunting me by telling me but not telling me anything about it. Leaving it a surprise- which I hate.

"I love you." I kiss him again and pull back to look into his deep blue eyes.

"I love you too. Tell Mira I love her too." He says.

"Hun, she's asleep. Remember you put her to bed an hour ago." I remind him.

"I know, just if she wakes up." Tobias says.

Even though she's still an infant, Tobias and Miracle have this growing bond that I can't begin to understand. But it's honestly and truly beautiful.

"Okay Four, let's move it out of here." Shauna says walking up behind me. I laugh at Tobias's annoyed face.

"Four buddy come on, the strippers are waiting." Zeke yells and I look at Tobias.

"He's joking." Tobias quickly tells me and I laugh. Getting one last kiss from my man, my last kiss from my fiancé.

Knowing that the next time I kiss him... he'll be my husband.

I watch as he walks out, and I'm about to close the door when his foot stops it from closing.

"Wait! Here" He says out of breath from running back.

He hands me a small envelope, sealed with my name in swirly letters on the front.

"Open it when you go to bed okay." Tobias instructs me.

I nod as he kisses my cheek one last time then leaves.

****
After a full night of gossip, movies, laughs, and cries.. the girls head home but assured me that they'll be back bright and early to help me. The girls downed in presents, most really more for Tobias's benefit but I was still appreciative.

I checked on Miracle one last time and she was still out like a light. As she's gotten older, she's become a better sleeper.

So I go on to my bed and change into one of Tobias's long black shirts that reaches mid thigh on me, taking in his scent. Pulling my hair into a messy bun, I get under the covers.

I look over at his side and wish that the space there was filled with him. Feeling a coldness without him beside me.

I remember the envelope so I grab it off the dresser.

Taking my time I open it, pulling out a letter- a few pages long.

My dearest Tris,

I know that I'm supposed to wait and pour my love out in the vows I will share tomorrow, but I couldn't wait. And this all to you may seem like some cliché romantic gesture and maybe it is...

I can't help but think sometimes what my life would be if I had never met you, or fallen in love with you. Where I'd be if I weren't with you. What I'd be doing...

I've had a lot of miracles and blessings in my life time... some I'm still baffled I got or ones I still believe I was never worthy to get.

I was blessed to escape Marcus, find freedom in a place that truly would be my home.

I was blessed to make it in Dauntless, find myself and to find the place I fit in best.

I was blessed to make the friends that I did and have the instructor that I did.

Now the biggest one by far would have to be meeting you. I was blessed to find you, blessed to fall for you... blessed to love you.

You'll never know that extent of my love for you Beatrice Prior, because everyday it grows more and more.

You've become my life, and my world. You've helped me find the part of me that I was still missing. You helped me mend all my scares and bruises, the ones that I thought would be permanent.

You showed me more of myself and more of my worth than anyone else. You never showed my pity, or looked at me like I was wounded. You showed me compassion and love, you showed me that I could conquer my past.

You never gave up on me, never let me loose myself without fighting to have me see the truth.

I was blessed to have you come back to me. I lost you, I lost my life and my love... and the day you showed up at my door... I thanked the lord above for bringing you back to me.

Getting my daughter was a gift that I'll never be able to repay you for. She's the other light of my life.

I'm not worthy of your love Tris, I'm just not. You fell in love with a broken down, scarred, lonely man. And you showed him what it was like to live again, what is was like to feel alive and to feel like there was worth to it all.

Saying I love you to you... just never seems like enough. But until I figure out a deeper word to use... it'll have to do.

I love you Beatrice -soon to be Eaton- Prior. Never forget that.

-Tobias