Matti
It's been about a week since Payton burned the hoodie and I can already tell that it helped her. She's sitting on my couch talking to my friends with the biggest smile on her face. She has no idea that I'm watching her. She has no idea how beautiful she is when she smiles like that. She's captivating every thought in my mind.
This girl has completely changed me and I can't even begin to explain how. Most people wouldn't notice the change because it's the kind of thing two people share with each other. I don't know how I ever let her slip away. I don't know if I've said this enough but I love her with every fiber of my being.
I just need to tell her that.
I'm just nervous she doesn't feel the same way about me. I know she likes me but love is very different. She might think it's moving too fast and decide she can't handle it. She could totally be thinking the opposite way and wanting to keep it casual. We haven't really discussed the depths of our expectations for each other.
I know what Payton deserves and I'm confident I can be what she needs. I'm ready to bring us to the next level, I'm just not sure she is yet. She's had a lot of things to deal with. A lot of it being recent and a lot of it being in the past, but I know stuff like that doesn't just disappear. She's going to feel the effects of them for the rest of her life.
I have confidence she can heal from them but she hasn't shown too much interest in doing that. She seems content with the constant pain that follows trauma. It's like she wants to heal but doesn't want to let go of it at the same time.
I lose my track of thought the second my eyes link with hers. She holds the eye contact before turning back to my friends and telling them she'll be back. She walks over to be with a smile on her face and says "what are you thinking about?"
"You" I replied with a grin
"Me?" She raises her eyebrows with a cocky grin "what a surprise!" I roll my eyes and pull her down into my lap.
"You think you're funny, huh?" I started tickling her sides and holding her down so she can't escape
"I'm extremely funny!" She shrieks as she tries to squirm away from my grip "Matthew!"
"Yes my darling?" I say sarcastically
"Let go of me right now!" She screams as she continues to slip out of my arms. Then suddenly she goes still. I go still with her to make sure everything is okay. She looks up at my face with the cutest puppy dog eyes I've ever seen. "Please" she even stuck out her lower lip for brownie points.
I look down at her lips and then back up to her eyes. She sees the look I'm giving her and grabs ahold of my shirt. She pulls me down so that I'm eye level with her. "You didn't let me go so you don't get a kiss" and she pushed me back to where I was before.
She goes to stand up but before she got away I grabbed her waist and made her sit back down. "You don't get to walk away" I say with a smile
"No?" She asks sarcastically. I shook my head and grabbed the back of her neck before pulling her face into mine. She immediately smiled into the kiss and grabbed onto my face.
I pulled back and she huffed in disagreement. "We can't go any further Pay." I said as i pointed to my friends "people are present"
"I'm sure they wouldn't mind a show" she said while rolling her eyes and smirking at me.
"I don't care how kinky my friends are I'm not putting on a show for them." I deadpanned at her "that's for me and you only" I winked and she laughed
She stood up and grabbed my hand to guide me to the couch so I would be involved in the conversation. "Oh, look the lovebirds are finally done being gross" Reese snickered
"Oh shut up Reese you enjoyed it" Payton said while rolling her eyes and throwing a pillow at his face
"That is so far from the truth!" He faked being offended and started laughing. Soon enough everyone was laughing and started mocking Payton and I.
Being gathered around like this brings me back to middle school when we were all still friends. I mean minus me dating Payton. I didn't even realize that this part of me was missing until Payton reappeared. She brought back together the missing puzzle pieces and added a little extra joy to the mix.
An: IM SO SORRY I TOOK FOREVER TO UPDATE. this is also a really short chapter I'm sooooo sorry
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Easily broken
RomanceEver since middle school Payton White has been basically invisible to everyone and she likes it that way. That is until someone bumps into her and tries to get Payton to stop hiding. Will she resist? Will it work? Will it be enough?
