I stood up and slid my hands around her waist, looking deep into her eyes. She wrapped her arms around my neck and reciprocated the eye contact. I felt my heartbeat quicken when her hands moved to my face making me question her next move.
She go...
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GIOVANNI DELUCA
Saying goodbye is something that we often have do.
Some goodbyes are desired. Similar to when you're stressed about something and the moment that the stress is finally gone. That's a good, goodbye. You're worries finally exit your mind, leaving you with relief.
However, most goodbyes aren't desired. At least not for me.
Once in my life, five years ago, I had to say goodbye to Tessa. Well, I didn't even get to say goodbye, I just had to leave. But, I said goodbye to our relationship and walked away with love that I had no place to put. Now, in the present day, I had to say goodbye to her again.
The doctors told me that there was no way that she'd survive due to her brain function dropping to almost nothing. Once her brain shut down, so did everything else. My mom and my sisters stood around us while I held Tessa's hand and finally let go of her. She's gone.
I thought the worse pain I'd ever felt was watching her brake, from a distance after I had left for the first time. I was wrong. This is the worst pain.
I just wish her death could be fake like mine was.
Now, at her funeral service, it was time for me to stand up and give a speech.
I've tried to write a speech for this one million times. I've tried to figure out how to write a goodbye letter to the love of my life and somehow, nothing is good enough. Nothing can sum up the love that we had and the love that I still have for her. What am I supposed to do with the love I still have for her?
How am I supposed to live in a world in which Tessa Sariano doesn't exist? I'm not sure that I can.
I adjusted my blue tie, which is a tribute to her. I stood up from my seated position in an attempt to gather myself before I speak to everyone here about Tessa.
Leo and Bianca followed me to the front of the church and stood on either side of me as if they were bodyguards of some sort.
I looked over at Tessa who laid dormant in a wooden box. Her skin was no longer radiant. Her eyes are closed forever. The realization that they'll never open again, giving me the chance to look into them, breaks me.
Bianca places a hand on my shoulder, probably realizing my racing thoughts getting the best of me.
"We've got you, brother." she said, and I nodded in response, putting both hands in my pockets and clearing my throat.
"H-Hello everyone. Thank you all for coming." I said, still not knowing what to say beyond that."
"I'm not exactly sure how to sum up my love for Tessa. I don't think it's possible, if I'm being honest. She truly was everything to me. She was any and everything I could ever want. Hell, she still is. The love I had for her is not a love that can be matched. On days where I was upset, her laugh brought me back to life. The fact that someone like her existed, here on Earth, brought me hope. She was the one. I don't feel the need to ever fall in love again. I wanted to marry her, someday. I dreamt of the family we'd grow together." I paused for a moment as a second wave of realization had set in. The fact that these words are really coming out of my mouth makes me feel nauseous.
