Lou's Gold (Larry Stylinson) (COMPLETE)

Chapter 14: Answer My Question, Louis

I fumbled with the piece of paper in my right hand, tapping to every syllable I whispered with my left. After finding the rhyming points, I was able to hear the tune in my head Louis had intended with the song he wrote. Though he only got to the chorus, I couldn't stop repeating it to myself.

Counted all my mistakes and there's only one

Standing out from a list of the things I've done

All the rest of my crimes don't come close

To the look on your face when I let you go

I sat back on the chair in Louis' kitchen island. I can continue this. At this point in the song, the narrator only wants to have their loved one back. They want the other person to stop being afraid and come back to them. As they plead, they're still asking themselves whether or not the other person will ever love them again.

My lyric book lay face down in front of me, I was afraid I'd copy down Louis' song word for word if I looked it over long enough. I had since memorized it and reached over for my pen to write what I had thought up as the second verse.

Yeah the taste of your lips on the tip of my tongue

Is at the top of the list of the things I want

Mind is running in circles of you and me

Anyone in between is the enemy

Shadows come with the pain that you're running from

Love was something you never heard enough

I folded the piece of paper back to its original state and placed it in between the pages of my lyric book as a bookmark. Upstairs, I heard a toilet flush and the sink run for a few minutes followed by a disgusted spit. I sighed and frowned, my forgotten hunger finally catching up with me.

I wondered how stupid I looked, ready to ask the man I met not one week ago about whether or not he liked me. It had taken everything I had to push my stubbornness away and admit that I even liked him in the first place. My first mistake was to think it was going to be simple. It's never, ever simple.

I stretched my back and arms, sighing heavily. It's not even about the word like anymore. I'd never been so confused about how I felt before. Hell, I'd never felt anything before. Before Louis, I could tell myself to snap out of it if I ever developed a crush on a girl I slept with or if I ever thought twice about giving a guy my number in the morning.

I gripped my pen angrily, dragging it back and forth on the table in front of me. I hated everything I was thinking and how vulnerable Louis made me feel. I hated the fact that I had let myself open up to a guy I'd just met and let him in, literally and emotionally. I hated the fact that I went against everything I believed in and fell. I fell so hard that I was losing who I was before Louis and I didn't know if that was even a bad thing.

I hated it, but I loved it.

I loved how my heart beat fast whenever our eyes met. I loved how his smile sent my body flaring and lifted me off my feet. I loved how his laugh engulfed me in a wave of happiness and had me snorting along with him. I loved how his touch slowed time and isolated the two of us from the world. I loved his kiss that fed my yearning lips and created sweet bruises on my skin. I loved his gentle nature hidden by his loud, spontaneous exterior. I loved how he talked to those around him, a few curses to those who really deserved it. I loved the crinkles by his eyes when he smiled. I loved how his personality danced well with mine. I loved-