Will We Talk?

24- Issues

Sam's POV:

So its been a little over a week since Owain told me that I was shortlisted for a Brit award and I still haven't told Evie. As much as I felt guilty for not telling her, I'm feeling slightly nervous to tell her. But, yet again, she's my girlfriend and I need to trust her and tell her everything.

It feels like most of North Shields knew about it, so I was surprised as to how she hadn't found out yet. I was glad to know she didn't know, I wanted to tell her, but I haven't found the right moment. Telling your significant other that you're potentially getting a Brit award isn't something that normally comes up in conversation.

When Evie got home, I was surprised as to how long she was taking to get her shoes and coat off as she stayed in the hallway for a while. I had walked out of her office, where I was strumming on my guitar, and straight to where she was.

The bitter winter air had nipped at her nose, cheeks and ears as they glowed a precious shade of pink. Her eyes were glossy from the attack of the breeze. But she stood there, chest rising and falling as she breathed in and out heavily as her thumb kept on counting all of her fingers. And that's when I realised that she was close to having a panic attack, or maybe even an anger episode. But did Evie experience anger issues?

My heart dropped when she looked up at me, her eyebrows curling in. She sniffed, taking her heavy coat from her shoulders and dumping it on the rack. I couldn't read her. For once in my life, I couldn't read her and I wish I could've.

"Yee alreet?" I asked, approaching her.

She held her hand out to stop me, so I did. Then she took her shoes off and stormed right past me and into her bedroom, the door slamming behind her.

What do I do now? Give her space or follow her? Either way, she's going to complain.

I started to head for the room until she came out, footsteps heavier than usual. An obvious sign she's more angry over upset. Was that a good thing? I was soon to find out.

While she headed towards her kitchen, I stood there confused and debating my next actions. But then I headed into the kitchen, admiring her filling her hot water bottle up.

"Evelyn, talk to me." I demanded lightly, attempting to comfort her.

"Really, Sam?" she scoffed, slamming her hand down on the counter, "So I need to talk to you and you can't talk to me?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, panicked and shocked at her sudden outburst.

"Don't play dumb, Sam." she scoffed, continuing with her tasks around the kitchen.

That's a lot of 'Sam's there, she must genuinely be really cross at me.

"Evelyn, I really divnt understand what you're cracking on aboot." I replied, heading further into the kitchen.

"You sure? Or can you explain to me why the fuck I've just found out that you're shortlisted for a Brit award by some random fan of ours who seemed to serve me in the Co-op?" she seethed, teeth gritting as she faced me, back to the counter and arms crossed across her chest.

"I didn't really know how to tell you, Evelyn." she shot me the dirtiest look I've saw her give anyone, "It sounds like a shitty excuse, but I'm being genuinely honest."

"Too right does it sound shitty, Sam. Imagine not having balls big enough to tell your girlfriend that you might be getting a huge award. You surprise me every fucking day, Samuel Fender." she scoffed, snatching her hot water bottle from the bench and going to leave the room.

That was until I stood in the doorway, blocking her from leaving, "I'm done here, Sam. Give me an hour or so to cool off, then talk to me." she ordered.

I nodded, moving from the door to let her through as my head dropped in defeat.

How the fuck did I manage to fuck up so royally? Mam always told me that I had to be deadly honest with my girlfriends, put them first and care for them. She also told me to do as I'm told, so I need to step away from her for a while, like she asked.

But the grand question is, how am I meant to step up from this?

*****

As much as I was trying to distract myself for that hour, nothing was helping me destress myself- not even the guitar, nor song writing. My leg bounced as my head was swarmed by so many thoughts, torturing me with the bad ways out of this situation.

I knocked once or twice on the door to her room, hoping she'd walk to the door and embrace me, accepting the fact I couldn't bring myself to tell her. But instead, I heard light sobs and I immediately thought the worst.

I burst through the door, making a beeline towards the bed she sat on. Sure enough, she was cuddled into her pillow, sobbing into it as her eyes were a bloodshot red and mascara trails rolled down her cheeks. All that and she still looked so ethereal.

My arms instinctively pulled her in, kissing her curls lightly, stroking them a little too. Her arms wrapped around me, head on my chest as her sobs echoed around the room. Since I saw her last, she'd taken her hair out and changed into joggers and a jumper, wearing her boot slippers. Her touch was so comforting to me, no matter the situation we were in. I love her. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for her.

She detached herself from my embrace, looking straight into my eyes. Looking into those beautiful grey eyes were a hobby of mine I'd never take for granted. Her lips interlocked with mine for a short while of time, before she pulled away.

"I'm sorry. I've had such a shit day and I've took it out on you." she whimpered as I held her hand.

"Its fine, I understand. I should've told you as soon as I found out, but I was too busy celebrating with Owain on the streets of Shields." I chuckled slightly.

"Aye, I hear you had a bit of beef with that taxi seat." she snorted, showing that smile I adored. Her teeth were straight, much straighter than mine and they provided such a precious smile. Especially the slight gap in the middle of her top teeth.

"And with the taxi driver too. Wasn't a happy man when we got out like, but I was too overwhelmed." I explained, still smiling at her smile.

"Look, I'm not bothered you didn't tell me, I'm not shocked you didn't tell me. I'm proud, Sam. Super proud. But, Joseph showed up to work today and made my day a living hell." she informed me, voice and lips shaking.

"Why the fuck did they let them in?" I questioned, suddenly enraged at the mentioning of her ex.

"We are severely understaffed, they must've given him a job. I then confronted Marvin about it, and he just said to suck it up. If I don't, I'm getting the sack." she added, fists clenching.

"So you're going to have to put up with him?"

"Well, not really. I quit." she hesitated, fiddling with her fingers, "I'll find another job soon enough. But I need to get your opinion on something first."

"I'm all ears." I smiled.

"I've been debating going back to university, finish my final year. I'll get a part time in the meantime that I can continue when I'm there." she explained.

I couldn't be prouder. The way she's thought this out, trying to make a name for herself. She's like me in so many ways, yet so different. That's why we click. That's why I love her so much.