Will We Talk?

30- Dad

Considering no one walked in, I'm pretty sure we were safe from the wrath of my dad and brothers. As soon as I got up from the bed, I immediately pulled my hair into a low ponytail and placed my pyjamas on myself. Sam did the same, lathering himself in deodorant too.

"Howay downstairs, the night's not over yet." I ordered, opening my bedroom door as Yvonne walked down the corridor and winked at me.

She knew.

Yvonne always knew.

Yvonne was the one who made me take the pregnancy test more than a year ago now. If it weren't for her, I might never have known I was with child- I had no pregnancy symptoms.

As much as I love Christmas, its quite rough walking around knowing I could've had a bairn with me. A bairn I could spoil with love and toys and everything in between.

Sam exited the door after me, hand gripping onto mine as we raced down the stairs.

When we got to the living room, everyone was there already, meaning Sam and I had the floor seats to watch the film.

"Reet. What am I putting on?" dad asked from his chair, remote in hand, "I'm not watching whatever shit we had on last year."

"Love Actually." Bradley suggested, holding his mug of hot chocolate.

Shit, I'd forgotten to bring Sam and I's mugs down. We always sat watching a Christmas film with the stuff mam got us. I was not going to be the one to ruin this tradition.

"I'll be two secs, I'm going to get mine and Sam's mugs." I announced, getting up from the floor.

Not wanting to miss the film, I ran up the stairs, unintentionally making tons of noise as I did so. I could've swore I heard my mam shout 'shut up' or something, which sounded entirely like a her thing to say.

I searched frantically for the Christmas boxes, completely forgetting where I had threw them. They weren't in a visible place, so I checked under my bed, pulling out what I thought was our boxes. It wasn't.

It was a little red box, one similar to the one that the twins had. I crossed my legs and sat on the floor, opening it up. My body let out a light gasp as I saw what was inside, I completely forgot I put that under my bed.

I couldn't help it, I had to cry.

It was a Christmas box mam made me last year for the baby. She gave both Yvonne and me one, but Yvonne's obviously came into play, and mine didn't.

I was pulled from my breakdown by a knock on my door.

"Sorry, I won't be a sec." I sniffed, cleaning my face off.

"You good?" came dad's voice.

I tried to reply but all that came out was a slight whimper, immediately alerting my dad to come into my room. One look at what was before me and he had his head in his hand.

"Oh Evie." he sighed, plonking himself beside me, pulling me into his body.

Hugs from dad like this are rare, making the moment even better when he does give you one. His frame was much larger than mine, comforting me even more than it would've if it was mam. The height made it seem like he shielded me from my problems, which is exactly how a hug should feel.

"Why me daddy? Why couldn't it have happened to someone stronger than me? What did I do wrong?" I quivered into his chest, likely wetting his shirt.

"The world is strange, darlin'. Don't you think this has happened to your mam and I before?" he comforted, rubbing my arm.

"Serious?" I questioned, pulling away from him and drying my tears.

"Aye, deadly. I've had your mam like this tons. Like when we were trying for you, she miscarried twice before we got you." he explained, I held his hands as a gesture of support.

"Wow. That's mental." I sniffed.

"And what you said before, you are strong. With every inconvenience, you're getting stronger and stronger. Look at what happened with alcohol, we both got over that. You're one of a kind, Evelyn, don't let anyone else or yourself tell you anything different." he expressed, before standing himself and me up.

I pulled him into another hug, my ear resting on his chest as I heard the beat of his heart. His head sat atop mine.

"I love you dad." I bawled.

He left a soft kiss to my hair, "I love you more." then he pulled away, holding my shoulders, "Get yourself cleaned up, I want to see that bonny smile again." he smiled before walking out.

I'll forever be a daddy's girl.

*****

"You took your time." mam remarked as I stepped into the kitchen with the mugs.

"Sorry." I muttered, placing the mugs on the counter for her.

"What we watching then?"

"Love Actually I think." I laughed, knowing mam wasn't the biggest fan.

"For fucks sake. Brad's doing?" she questioned.

"How did you guess?" I chuckled, grabbing mine and Sam's hot chocolates from the bench and heading to the living room, followed by mam.

*****

The film had finished and Bradley, Bailey and Yvonne had all fallen asleep. To be honest, I was on my way out too but Love Actually is 100% one of my favourite Christmas films so I had to stay awake. Mam secretly enjoyed it, I could tell.

"Right then, its off to bed for all of yous." mam demanded, making the three jolt awake.

"What time's it?" Bailey groaned, stretching in his seat.

"Like 11 ish." Sam answered.

"Alreet, that's my bedtime." Bailey said, standing from his seat and pulling Yvonne up.

The two were stopped by mam as they tried to leave, "Picture, get in front of the tree." she pointed, grabbing the camera from the table.

Since the others had fallen asleep, Sam and I were the last couple to get out photo taken. He looked really fit in those pyjamas, his hair was all scuffed and his eyes were getting heavy. The two of us posed for the photo in front of the tree, then mam sent us all out.

This time, she had her cam-corder on as she'd film us exiting the door where she placed mistletoe.

When Sam and I left, he picked me up as my legs wrapped around his waist. Even after the little kiss for the video, he kept me in his arms, managing to run up the stairs with me.

"Pack it in squirming around man, I'll drop you." he grunted as he ran up the stairs.

"Or just put is down, for the love of God." I complained, trying to unravel my legs, but Sam was having none of it.

"I'm not letting go of you tonight." he explained as he shut my bedroom door and placed me on my bed.

"I love you, you know." I mumbled as my eyes began to close.

"Aye?" Sam responded, his arms wrapping around me.

"Mhm. I love you Sammy." I repeated, slowly dozing off.

"I love you too Evie." he reminded, kissing me again as we fell asleep.