Love my kids to death, but I am stressed out.
I don't even know how to go about certain things. My daughter has this insane ass attitude now and my son is just....a baby. Like there's no other way to explain it. He's only a month old.
Dealing with the two of them is just getting harder. Lynn says things that really have me thinking like damn....
Yesterday she said I needed to take my medicine so I wouldn't be crazy and mess stuff up. It just made me realize that this recent incident really flipped things. Especially for her.
Plus she's getting older so more expression is building up. She's speaking her mind a whole lot. I can't even get upset because it's growth, that's gonna happen. And Bey and I encourage her to talk to us, no holding stuff in. Plus look at Bey and I. We're prime examples of where she gets it from.
So i've just been trying to be calm and not so discipline like. Of course I correct her when she's wrong, but i'm also trying to understand. Being with someone that has anger issues and having a child with it is completely different. Not saying Lynn has it, but that's kind of what i'm seeing at this rate.
Could be a phase.
"Lynn come eat baby."
"No."
"No? Are you not hungry?" I looked at her confused. She just woke up and told me she wanted to eat so....I made her some oatmeal with fruit. Better get her tail up she come eat it. "I made your oatmeal and fruit."
She didn't say anything, just rubbed her eye as she got out the bed. Still sleeping with me of course. That'll most likely never change.
I followed her to the table, giving her the plate and kissing her head. It's so early, i'm not sure why she's getting up at this time. Especially on the weekend.
Marcel has been woke for about two hours now. I had to change his diaper. He was crying so I knew that was it. But he's been chilling since. Just looking at cartoons with no sound. I went to sleep on him for a little bit.
"You hungry fat man?" I picked him up, pulling his mittens down. He made baby noise as I started to make his bottle. Thankfully he wasn't being so hard this morning, actually having patience for me to not have to pull out a titty.
Now I hope he take the bottle nip. I fear that he's already a bit hooked to my nipple. I'm trying to stop it. That's what I didn't want to happen.
I sat on the couch, starting to feed him while watching Lynn eat. My eyes focused on her, just staring. At the same time I was swishing the bottle in Marcel's mouth cause he was acting as though he didn't want that. I know he's hungry, he hadn't eaten yet.
"Mars come on." I whispered looking down at him. The way his head kept turning told me he was about to cry. So I sighed untying my robe and letting him latch. Now he's just fine. How does he know which is which? Like damn.
He held my boob with one hand and had his eyes closed. I chuckled because he always get so comfortable.
"I want my auntie Nia."
I looked at Lynn and she was just eating.
"I don't wan be here anymore Mommy."
"You don't want to be with Mommy? Why?"
"I don't like it!" She raised her voice. It shook Mars and me because even he shook a little. The fuck is she yelling at me for? I haven't even done anything to make her not like it here....
"Why not? You wanna talk to mommy and tell me what's going on?"
"I want my Mama."
"Ok but you're with Mommy right now stink, come here." I sat up on the couch making sure Cel was straight. He was just sucking away. Lil fat ass. "Talk to me. What did Mommy do?"
