Chapter 33. Blaming himself

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Bucky left Steve alone with the agent. He couldn't believe that fury hired this guy, let alone let him work at the tower, not knowing that he was part of hydra. And now his mate along with his pups, were now paying the price for the agent being there, all because fury didn't pay attention.

 And now his mate along with his pups, were now paying the price for the agent being there, all because fury didn't pay attention

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Bucky eventually made it up the stairs, to his and Shauna's floor. He looked at the door waiting impatiently for it to open, he whined and growled in frustration waiting for the door to be opened. He looked at Peggy, before looking past her to his mate whom was still leaned over obviously in pain. He zipped past Peggy and over to his mate, gently nuzzling his snout against her arm and belly. He listened to his mates soft whined of pain, along with feeling her pain knowing that she was very sore in her stomach from the twins being all stressed out, and in pain from the dose of the serum they were both given.

"Luna you have to shift. Their hurting you." Bucky told her through their telepathic connection, that they had had bonded mates. He watched her glance at him with her purple eyes, he watched her look at Peggy growling lowly as her fangs came in. To witch Peggy got the memo and nodded her head, before telling Friday to tell Helen to wait until Shauna had shifted into her wolf form.
Bucky turned back to his mate after Peggy had left and closed the door behind her. He looked at Shauna watching her closely, as he shifted back to his human form. Bucky groaned softly as he shifted back, almost falling before managing to catch himself on the bed. "Doll you can do it. Shift." He told her, with his eyes still wolf white as he watched her growl and howl in pain as she shifted in her wolf form.

As Shauna shifted into her wolf form, she was howling and growling in pain due to the twins moving around a lot more as she shifted to her wolf.

Once fully shifted, she whined as she fell over onto the bed, on her side looking more relaxed now but exhausted

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Once fully shifted, she whined as she fell over onto the bed, on her side looking more relaxed now but exhausted. Shauna looked at Bucky with her purple eyes, she closed her eyes and made a happy wolf sound, feeling Bucky gently petting her wolf head. "Feel better doll?" She heard Bucky ask her. She opened her eyes looking at him, while sniffling his hand, as he rubbed her belly gently to feel the twins moving around as pups. Shauna felt bad watching as he frowned and looked upset, like he wanted to cry, yell and or scream.

For the pain that she and the twins had been caused due to the hydra agent, whom had injected her and the twins with super soldier serum. "A little bit. The twins seem to be relaxing. Are you alright Buck?" Shauna asked him through their mind link, even though she felt his guilt and ping of regret for ever going on that mission and leaving her home alone.

Buck didn't know what to say, as he got up off the bed and got changed into some new clothes. He limped a little bit still, but it wasn't as bad as it had been before. "Yeah." He said, as he pulled his shirt on over his head. "Just worried about you and the twins. I shouldn't of left you here alone without me. I should've known this was going to happen. I should've known hydra wouldn't leave my family alone." He sighed softly, but was clearly upset by what has happened to his family while he was away and was unable to protect them.

"We'll be okay. This...this isn't your fault Buck." Shauna told him through their mind link, before hanging her head when Bucky raised his voice a little bit out of anger and guilt. Bucky looked at his mate, he knew that they'd be alright at least he hoped so. "Not my fault? I wasn't hear to protect you or them!  That serum is dangerous Shauna! Not only for the twins, but also for you. The twins are now stronger, more so then before. I should've been here to protect you, like I'm supposed to but I failed too. How am I supposed to keep you and them safe, if I can't be here to do so?"

Bucky raised his voice at his mate, which he had never done do to reasons. But his expression immediately softened and turned into one of regret, seeing how his anger was hurting his mate and scaring her.

Bucky immediately sighed and ran a hand through his long hair, after rubbing his hand over his face. "I-I'm...I'm sorry doll. I didn't mean to yell at you. I just...sigh....I should've been here for your safety." He walked over to the edge on the bed sitting on it with his back to her, with his head in his hands guilt and regret washing over him. "I just want to be able to keep you and the twins safe. If I can't do that, how am I going to be able to protect them once their born? I don't want anything to happen to you or to them. Shauna I....I'm scared of being a failure of a father and husband." He said, before removing his hands from his face, after feeling Shauna swatted her paw at him gently.

"It's okay. Your upset and stressed out about what happened, while you were away on a mission. What happened was not your fault. I know you blame yourself, but you can't James okay? You are doing a good job at protecting me and them. What happened though, was hydra's stupidity and sneakiness that caused this. You did nothing to cause it, they did because they waited til I was alone and you were hurt.

Before they tried anything, knowing that if you had been here sooner this wouldn't have happened to me. So lease do not blame yourself, for this please...and you are not going to be a failure of a husband or father. Because you already are a good fiancé and father, way before the twins are even born. You look out for me and them, even now with you being right here with me." Shauna told him, through their link meaning every word that she was telling him. "I love you Buck."

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