Draco Malfoy and The Aeternum Caput | Drarry

The Breaking Point

TW: Angst, strong feelings of self-depreciation, self-doubt, and shame.

Draco went home, but he only had time for a quick shower and to eat whatever he could gather in less than half an hour. He drank a vial of his potion for headaches and finally he was feeling a bit better, a bit more like himself. But the prospect of confronting his mother still gave him huge waves of nausea. The thought of facing her, of confronting her and having to listen to what she was actually doing all this time was terrifying. Draco was too afraid of what the truth.

Despite his whole body fighting the idea of going back to his office, he apparated out of his house and into Siddons Lane. He laid his forehead into his beloved yellow bricks, wondering when he would end that nightmare of The Golden Butterfly. Draco opened the wards and when he stepped inside, he found Harry pacing back and forth in his reception.

– Draco! – Harry almost raced to him. – Are you alright?

Seeing Harry already there made Draco's heart leap and tighten all at once. He felt his nausea increasing, and his desperation with what he was about to do became almost unbearable.

– I'm fine. – Draco lied, closing the door, and feeling the wards closing in around them again. Then he stared at his feet, with no courage to look up at Harry. He felt like he was so close to breaking that anything would be enough to press his cracks too much and make him shatter completely.

Am I going to lose my mother as well? Was the thought ringing over and over again in his head, shutting down everything else.

– You don't look fine... – Harry took another step closer to him, and gently lifted his face. Draco felt such a desperate need to embrace him, to get some comfort from his touch, anything would do. Right before entering the auction, Draco had touched Harry slightly and he didn't mind. Maybe he would mind it if Draco did it again.

Harry seemed to read his mind somehow because he pulled Draco closer, gently touching his left arm while cupping his face.

– What's wrong? – Harry's voice was so soft, so gentle, that Draco felt his heart tighten even more and he knew his pain was showing in his face.

– Harry, I... – Draco felt his voice trembling and he grabbed the sleeve of Harry's red Auror robe.

– What happened? – Harry was growing desperate as well.

– I'm sorry. It's nothing. – Draco let his head drop on Harry's shoulder, and one more time he felt Harry leaning into their touch and inhaling deeply.

– Tell me! – Harry pleaded in a whisper. – Just tell me, please...

– My mother is coming here, Harry. But I don't know if I can question her. I'm just... I can't believe she would get involved with these people. Not after all we went through during the war. I feel like I'm so close to breaking, like I'll pass out anytime! – Draco spilled everything in a single breath, felling his eyes tearing up. His body started shaking and he could not muster any control anymore. He was on a downward spiral, a very bad one.

Harry slid his hand from Draco's arm to his back and pulled him even closer, and into an embrace, a soft and very real embrace. That was all Draco could ever ask for.

– Do you want me to question her in your place? – Harry offered.

– She won't talk to you Harry; she won't tell you anything. It has to be me. – Draco felt his voice shaking even more.

– Then I'll stay in the room. Under the cloak. I'll be there with you! – Harry offered instead.

Draco let himself feel Harry's presence, his touch, his delicious smell, his everything. He simply didn't care anymore. He didn't care if this was right, or wrong or if it even meant something. Draco just needed Harry, and Harry was there, was letting him stay close. Harry was offering to stay close to him. That was all that mattered.