Scene Packs From Other Stories

③④•Genshin Impact

I think I'll be writing for Utami and Genshin for awhile 😞

"I can't do that again."

FANDOM: Genshin Impact

Pairings: KaeTami (implied heavily)

Synopsis: Utami is scared to lose Kaeya like she did her husband, Markov, so many years ago. She's afraid of loving again even if she's much older.

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StartSTART

Utami entered the Angel's Share Tavern with a heavy heart, her usually vibrant aura muted by an uncharacteristic silence. Diluc, engrossed in his bartender duties, glanced up and noted the change in her demeanor. He poured the familiar Watermelon Tea into a glass, but before he could hand it to her, she made an unexpected request for something different- wine.

Setting the glass down, he studied Utami's face, concern etching his features. "Well something's troubling you. What happened?"

Utami hesitated, her gaze avoiding his intense crimson eyes. "It's about Kaeya."

Diluc sighed, a mix of frustration and familiarity in his expression. "I should've known. What did he do this time?"

Utami shot him a look that halted his defensive stance. "Just listen, Diluc. No interruptions."

She launched into a rant, her words a cascade of frustrations, listing every little thing about Kaeya that grated on her nerves. Diluc, unsurprisingly, found himself nodding along with most of her grievances, his agreement evident in the solemn silence that followed each point.

"And that's why loving him is maddening," Utami concluded, her tone carrying a mixture of exasperation and vulnerability.

Diluc paused in his cleaning routine, staring at her with a mixture of surprise and understanding. "Loving him? Are you serious?"

She raised an eyebrow, a teasing glint in her eyes. "Don't act like it's unheard of, Diluc. I've seen you with Thoma."

Diluc's cheeks tinted slightly, but he dismissed her comment with a wave. "That's different."

Utami leaned her head on the bar, exhaustion evident in her posture. "I don't want to love him. I don't like what that means for me."

"What do you think it means?" Diluc inquired, a genuine concern in his voice.

Utami lifted her head, meeting his gaze with a somber expression. "It means I have something to lose again, and I'm not strong enough for that anymore. I can't do that again."

Diluc's eyes softened, the weight of her words resonating with his own experiences. He knew the pain of loss, the fear of allowing someone to become that integral to your life. Silently, he understood Utami's unspoken fears, the scars of her past still haunting her as much as they did him.

As he contemplated his response, Diluc took a moment to appreciate the strength Utami had exhibited over the years. A lonesome widow who had rebuilt herself, rising through the ranks to become the Captain of the First Response Division, she epitomized resilience. As muxh as he held resentment to the Knights and everything they've done, what she's made of it is admirable. Yet, love remained a delicate subject for her, a territory laden with the remnants of a painful history.

"I get it, Utami," Diluc finally spoke, his tone gentle. "But don't let the fear of losing someone again prevent you from experiencing the joy they bring. You're stronger than you think, and you deserve happiness. Even if it's... Kaeya."

"Here I was hoping you'd be unbiased about this for once." Utami absorbed his words, humorously.

A mixture of gratitude and vulnerability was in her eyes. Diluc offered her a reassuring smile, a silent acknowledgment of the shared struggles they carried.

Utami sighed, the weight of her emotions momentarily lifted by Diluc's understanding. She appreciated the sincerity in his eyes, the silence that transcended from their usual banter. As she stared into her glass, contemplating his words, a subtle warmth filled her.

"You make it sound so simple, Luc," Utami admitted, a hint of a smile playing on her lips. "But feelings like these are a tricky business."

Diluc nodded, acknowledging the complexity of matters of the heart. "I'm not saying it's easy. Just don't let the fear dictate your choices. Kaeya may be utterly infuriating, but if there's something genuine between you two, don't be afraid to explore it."

Utami chuckled softly, a mix of amusement and resignation. "Never thought I'd hear Diluc Ragnvindr giving relationship advice."

He rolled his eyes, a playful smirk on his lips. "Well, the world is full of surprises."

Their conversation shifted into a more lighthearted banter, a familiar rhythm that resonated in the quiet corners of the Angel's Share. Utami found solace in Diluc's company, the shared understanding bringing a sense of comfort. The topic of Kaeya still lingered, an unresolved puzzle that Utami knew she needed to face.

As the evening progressed, Diluc subtly steered the conversation toward lighter topics, skillfully drawing Utami away from the weighty discussions. The laughter that echoed through the tavern carried a sense of accord, a reminder that even in the midst of complexities, moments of lightness could still be found.

"I suppose you're right, Diluc," Utami admitted, a genuine smile gracing her features. "Maybe I shouldn't overthink it too much."

Diluc raised an eyebrow, his usual stoic demeanor softening. "Well, that's a rare admission coming from you."

Utami playfully nudged him. "Don't get used to it. I still reserve the right to rant about Kaeya whenever I please. as do you."

Diluc chuckled, a warmth in his eyes that spoke of the genuine friendship they had forged over the years. As the night unfolded, Utami found herself grateful for the unexpected heart-to-heart with Diluc. It wasn't a solution to her internal struggles, but it offered a perspective she hadn't considered.

That night Utami lay in her bunk at the barracks, the moonlight filtering through the window casting a soft glow. The weight on her chest lingered, refusing to dissipate despite the comforting words shared at the tavern. She couldn't deny it any longer - she had fallen for Kaeya.

The admission echoed in the quiet confines of her thoughts, resonating with a mix of vulnerability and acceptance. Love, a word she had carefully guarded against for years, had stealthily crept into her heart. It felt like a free fall, an endless descent into unknown depths.

Utami closed her eyes, surrendering to the wave of emotions. The memories of her late husband, Markov, interwoven with the burgeoning feelings for Kaeya, created a tapestry of emotions that left her feeling suspended in time.

As she drifted into the realm of dreams, Utami couldn't escape the sensation of falling. Yet, in that descent, there was an odd sense of liberation. Perhaps love wasn't a weight to be carried, but a journey to be embraced.

The moonlight wind whispered its soothing lullaby, cradling Utami in its gentle breeze, and for once in a long time Utami surrendered to the vulnerability of her emotions, allowing herself to fall - not into darkness, but into the promise of a new dawn.