quick side note:
i know you'll be strong.
you'll be fine, no matter how empty you say you are.
now, on another note, i get to do this
fuck everything you seemed to stand for,
fuck everything you did to make me feel what i did,
fuck everything you so believed in,
fuck everything you did, in truth.
you're nothing more than a blotch on my name, truly
and i can't have my precious name, Delilah
so smudged in the first adult years of my life,
can i?
so yes, you fucked me up, and over.
i hope you really do feel proud of yourself over it.
especially with your inability to answer me,
you were of no use other than to make me realize how little relationships mean to me
and how much i even cared about them was wrong
keep in mind, you started all this with him.
you were major proponents in the fall of me,
temporarily.
you deserve nothing more than to be single for the rest of your years, if I'm being honest.
and as if to further tell me how little the people around you like the persona you put up,
reserved, unfaltering in your want of secrecy,
lack of open talking, no intimacy or closeness,
it's a mess. you don't speak to either of your closest friends that often.
may I suggest a mindset? everyone else is fake.
you will sometimes find those that rise from the pack of insanity, and give you a light of "hope", but truly, it means nothing.
you can definitely have relationships, but expect the worst, and hope for the best.
thank god i figured my shit out because you sure as hell didn't help me.
let me tell you what we became:
something stale. something that you thought of as an afterthought, even if a prominent one.
if im being honest? your tears fuel me more that you gave me nothing but trouble past the nights of help.
as ive said, so many times before
we're both fucked up.
but ive more realized, in recent times
you're more fucked up.
go get yourself checked up, my...acquaintance?
no, you deserve worse
my worst nightmare feels fitting, don't you?
p.s.
incase you didn't believe me, this is the magic
of redirecting emotions to different causes, ella. so much for you believing in me and loving me, huh?
YOU ARE READING
I'll Be Fine (pt. 2 of 2)
Poetrypoetry showing my stress. relieving, coping, really. continuing to add poems, sometimes daily. use this as place to talk about your own frustrations and dances with pain and strife
