Unraveling Secrets

Chapter 10

Nova

I got no sleep last night as expected. My bed was comfortable, but even in the most comfortable bed my demons will still come to haunt me in my sleep. No matter how much sleep medication I take, the nightmares never stay away. 

It is currently 4:45 in the morning, and I changed into my gym clothes so I can go distract myself. My brothers have a personal gym in their house, so now keeping in fighting shape will be much easier. I walk down the hall of bedrooms, keeping as quiet as I can. I know how easily it is to wake up to the quietest noise in our line of work. 

I flick on the lights to the gym, and look around at how big it really is. I take note of all the machines and things they have, and decide what I will work with for the day. I will start with the treadmill, and run a mile or two, and then I will work on weightlifting, and finish off with the punching bag. I don't want to do to much, as I am still injured even if I can't feel it that much. Greg really did a number on me, but I can only blame myself. All of those times I could have fought back I didn't, so really it is my fault I am like this.

As I finish up on the treadmill, I found that I ended up running three miles instead of two. I headed over to lift some weights, and decided to only do my warm up amount for my bodies sake. I started lifting the 185 Ibs, when I felt a presence nearby. I was not going to stop the set I was doing to check since the presence didn't feel threatening. 

"Hey Sorellina, did you want me to spot you? That's a lot of weight right there." The voice said. I recognized it as Matteo. 

I did not stop my set, but I did reply to him. "No its fine this is just my warm up ." I didn't hear a reply as I finished up my set and put the bar back. I sat up and looked at Matteo to find him staring at the bar with furrowed brows. "Um.. you good?" I say to him. He pulls his stare away and looks at me before speaking.

"You said this was your warm up weight?" Ahh right.. What girl could possible lift 185 pounds at the age of 16.

"Yeah that's correct. But that is all I will be doing today for weight lifting. I am just gonna do some hits on the punching bag and I will be done and out of your hair, if you were hoping to catch the gym by yourself... That is why you are up so early?" I say. I don't know why I am talking so much, I don't even know him.

"Oh no it is completely fine. I don't mind sharing the gym with you. But uh.. That's a lot of weight for a warm up." He says trailing off. I can tell he wants to ask some things, but he doesn't want to ask them at the same time.

"I have been working out for years, you begin to lift more over time Matteo. Do you think it was just beginners luck that got me into the police station?" 

"Well no- I guess not. What are you doing up so early?" He then asks.

"I believe I asked you that question just seconds ago." I say slightly playfully.

"Ah right. I just have work to do, and wanted to hit the gym before hand. And you?"

"I guess you can say I am an early bird." More like the nightmares are so unbearable they take my right of sleeping away from me, but I am not gonna say that.

"The twins could take some notes, most days it is hard to get then up in the morning for school." He says. He is definitely trying to make conversation with me. He seems nice, and I can see with just the small interactions I witnessed with him and his brothers he is defiantly more of a parental figure. 

"Seems like a bucket off cold water in the morning will do the trick. Imma finish up so I can take a shower." I told him before heading off to the punching bag that has been calling my name since I stepped into the gym. 

"Alright" He says with a small chuckle.

I wrap my wrists before I start. I try to keep in mind that Matteo is in here, so I don't go to crazy. I want to take all my anger out on the bag, and all of my feelings that I don't want to feel. But Matteo's presence holds me back and I hate being held back. That adds onto my anger. I stop before I lose control, and walk out of the gym. As I am heading to my room, the anger I wanted to lose starts to build up. It is turning into stress and a some sort of feeling a rarely feel, which I was told was anxiety. Those mixes usually lead to a panic attack. I am almost to my room but I know the feelings swirling inside won't let me reach it. I punch a hole in the wall, and my breathing is uneven. I stare at the hole I just created and walked into my room. 

I need to shower and calm down. I can't let them see the broken side of me.

Word Count: 930