Cursing the Moon Goddess

Chapter Thirty Three

Cole POV

For many years I deeply regretted accepting Kara's rejection. Whenever I visited Liam at Silver Moon Pack's territory, I imagined scenarios where Kara and I would meet again and we both regretted that day and somehow, feel the bond again. But that never happened and eventually I let the fantasy go.

Then, a week ago I felt a light bond again. To Mikaela. And I felt happier than ever that I finally got my second chance, even if it was one-sided for a few days. I thought that things would go smoothly after she felt the bond to me. But before she got the chance to, I connected with Kara again. Just like in my past fantasies. This was all messed up.

I couldn't accept Kara, not when Mikaela was in the hospital fighting for her life. Not when I had promised Mikaela I'd give us a chance before the battle. We had that promise to each other. I meant to keep it. But she doesn't want to keep it anymore.

I felt rejected again. Only this time it was only for a second. When that second was over, relief overcame me.

I'm relieved that Mikaela doesn't hate me. I'm relieved she understands why wolves feel the bond. Since Scarlett told me I had to choose between Kara and Mikaela I've been fighting myself, my wolf. So that neither of us would ever regret who we chose. But I believe Mikaela's words. I believe this second chance; this choice has always meant one thing.

For a long time, I had believed that we don't have a choice when it comes to having a Mate. But now, I think that even if we did have a choice, like I do now... we'd still choose the same person the Moon Goddess showed us through our wolves. I feel relieved because deep in my heart I know the Moon Goddess was right with me the first time. I knew it logically when I appreciated Kara's background. And when I chose for her to beat me at the duel. And again, when we danced together. I've known it all along.

But I felt that I had a promise to keep to Mikaela. A promise, which she decided to ignore when I told her about Kara. Now, Mikaela is asking me if I ever regretted accepting Kara's rejection. And I have. So many times.

- I won't let myself regret it this time. – I answer her. Then I get up and hug her. This time, I don't feel the electricity I felt before.

- Forgive me for not keeping my promise. I told you I'd choose you. – I whisper while still holding on to her.

- I know you meant it before. But now, I'd never forgive myself if I kept you away from your soulmate. – she whispers back.

I let go of her and take a few steps back.

- I've read enough about bonds to know what this situation means. Or are you going to tell me you feel more at ease with me than with her? – Mikaela asks me.

I consider it for a moment. When Mikaela arrived last week, I was a complete mess. When she was here at the hospital, it was the same. I didn't know what to do, how to deal with it. But when Kara arrived, we both handled ourselves with serenity.

I dueled with Kara and danced with her, I was just confused as to why it felt so easy, so natural.

- You seem to know the answer to that before I did. – I say to her.

She smiles at me, a sad smile. But not the same sad smile as the one she had when I first met her. This was a different sad. I thank her again for her understanding, and let her know Thomas is my Beta, and that he will come later to tell her how we decided to deal with her and her pack member's situation at Blue Moon.

I know it's time I searched for Kara.

As I leave the hospital, I get a strange feeling in my chest. Like anticipation. I can't wait to see Kara again, but I don't know what to tell her when I do. I can feel my wolf's energy as well. He's been oddly quiet in my head, probably trying to let me make the decision.