anxiety at it's finest.

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We reach our floor. The door is open. Chris and Felix takes my stuff to Chris room. I set my mom down on coffee table. Then head to the bedroom.  I go to the bathroom to start unpacking my makeup,  perfume, and soaps.

Then I head out to the bedroom I see another black closet.  I start putting my clothes away and under garments. I put my jewelry at the bottom of the closet. 

Chris comes in.

Channie:  got everything put up babe?

Me: yes. But where do I put my traveling luggage?

He takes me to the storage room.

Channie:  everyone puts the traveling backpacks and luggage here. 

Me: thank you baby.

Channie:  are you ok?

Me: yeah just alot overwhelmed.  But I'll be fine. My mind just has to catch up.

Channie: I know baby girl.  It's ok. Your world will go back to normal soon. But with someone else in it.

Me: thank you for everything.  I'll try to make it up some how.

Channie:  shut up no you won't. 

Me: mmmmm what did you say?

Channie: I said no you won't.

Me: no the beginning.

Channie: shut up.

Me: oh that just turns me on.

Channie:  oh really now?

Me: yes. When I hear your song 3racha and I heard you say shut up. That will damn.

Channie:  oh I got idea's.

Me: evil.

He smiles and laughs.

Channie: later baby girl.  You need to eat.

We head to the kitchen to see Sheryl and the boy's getting the table ready. Sheryl ordered food.

Sheryl:  I'm excited that another girl lives here now. Girl time is in order.

Me: I'd like that. Can I help with anything.

Sheryl: nope we've got everything. But thanks. She smiles.

Everyone sits down and starts eating.  I still have butterflies.  (When I have butterflies or my nerves are in a up roar I can't eat). But I know Chris will get upset so I eat a little. As much as I can stomach. The food is amazing. 

I  get up and go to the refrigerator there is my favorite monster drinks.

Me: OK who know?

Everyone pointed at Felix.

Me: thank you. 

I feel a tear fall. Fuck Renee chill. No crying.  I shrug it off. Why am I feeling emotional. I am usually not. Damn it stray kid's you've got me feeling.

Chris looks at me.

Channie:  hey baby are you ok?

Me: yep. Just a mental war in my head going.  No worries. 

Channie:  huh?

Me: I'll explain later.

Channie:  ok. Come eat. Then we'll go to the bedroom to talk.

Me: OK babe.

I wanted to say I can't eat anymore. But I sit down and eat a tiny bit more. 

Me: can I go lay down. I'm fine. Just need to lay down a bit.

Channie:  sure baby.

Me: thanks babe.

I get up and head to the bedroom.  I'm feeling light headed. I hope I make it there. Come on Renee you can do it.
I get to the door. Open it. Then I fall on the floor. 

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