The Elite (Completed!)

The Elite - Chapter Twelve.

It's been a while, and I'm sorry. Life's been hectic - you know how it gets sometimes. But I'm back, and excited to hear what you have to say!

Anyways, I'm not too sure what I think about this chapter. Mixed feelings?

Anyhow, I hope you enjoy!! :D

    Chapter (12)

    There where times when I wished I could just shut my mouth and not say anything – this was one of them. What I was offering was huge – exceptionally so – and if it didn’t work out as I hoped it would, then Jude would be devastated.

    I could sense his excitement as we trudged back to his cabin in silence, the white-lace falling around us in ribbons. It was a beautiful scene, the snow-caped mountains towering over us and soft, fresh snow layering the ground like a white blanket. I wanted to crawl up and let the snow cocoon me in my own silence.

    “Jude…” We stopped outside his room as he placed his hand on the door.

    “You can’t guarantee that this will work, I know. But please…just try. It hurts every minute of the day, like God’s squeezing my lungs tighter and tighter until one day I’ll suddenly stop breathing… I don’t want to stop breathing, Cassandra.” He answered for me. I looked away from his grief-stricken face and nodded.

    Jude’s room was a mess. He must have thrown all his things around the room in rush when he got back. A towel lay slung over the arm of the desk chair, a few sheets of paper strewn out across the un-made bed and items of clothing on the floor.

    But it smelled great – like axe and the tiniest hint of cinnamon. Normally I would have stuck my nose up at the thought of cinnamon because I hated how strong it tasted but standing in Jude’s room, I liked the smell of it. It was subtle and sweet.

    “Sorry about the mess.” He didn’t offer an explanation, instead offering me a seat on the bed. I sat down and tucked a flyaway strand of hair behind my ear before turning to look at him sitting next to me.

    “So, how do we do this again?” He wringed his hands together, his eyes running everywhere but me.

    “Take my hands.” He looked doubtfully down at my hands as I pulled my gloves off and offered them to him. Hesitantly, as if he thought a hurricane would start again, he placed his in mine and I curled my fingers around his soft ones.

    “The hardest part should be the start – you’ll need to think of your parents. Think of the day they passed away-“ I gulped, seeing him close his eyes before carrying on. “What you felt, what you smelt, touched, heard, smelt. Everything.”

    His fingers clutched tighter onto mine and I gave a sympathetic smile at the closed eyed Jude.

    “Stop with the sympathy, Cassandra.” He ordered, his eyes staying closed but hands still squeezed tightly over mine. The smile fell off my face and I closed my eyes too, concentrating on what flowed in between us.

    At nothing I felt nothing, like he had just put up this huge road block to his mind but after a few struggled tries, the block started to fall down. Anger flooded through, followed by an overwhelming sense of sadness then finally hate. Hatred for himself.

    Colours flashed inside my eyelids – red, black, white and grey. No pink, no yellow. No sunshine, no love. Red for blood, black for emptiness, white for nothing and grey for in-between. I knew how it felt to be in the in-between, and it wasn’t very nice. Knowing that you belong nowhere and love no-one is one of the hardest feelings a human being could face.