Shades of emotions: A Journey through poetry

Hate is a strong word.

The word hate is a strong word,
but it doesn't describe you.

No matter how many times my mind goes through the process of what happened to us.
I thought you were my everything.
I couldn't see the real you through the love I thought was real.

I was blind.
I was Suffocating from the darkness around your aura.
I was changing myself for you,
so could love me.

Who would love the real me?
You didn't want a kid, but I did.
I was slowly changing my mind.

You would always get mad at me when I was trying to express my feelings,
but all I wanted was for you to hold me and tell me everything is going to be okay.

Instead,
you lectured me.
I put you on this high petal stool.
You made my dad like you and called you son.
He never called anyone that.

I honestly loved you,
well what I thought was love.
You never really did love me.

You just loved the thought of being with me.
You blamed yourself over things you couldn't control.
I told you I was broken, you kept saying you were too.
Tried to say my brain needed to be fixed,
and that you wouldn't be like the other guys that hurt me,

but you turned around and did just that.

You told me to be an adult.
When you know me for a year!
You thought I would steal from you.

You thought you could ruin everything I worked so damn hard for.
You threatened to call the cops on me.
Even though you were lying throwing your teeth.
When you couldn't get me wired up.

You tried another punch.
Last thing I ever said to you.
I'm going to pray for you.

Funny how you tried to get the military involved with this.
There's a thing about a grace period.
All I had to do was tell the truth and I did.

After that,
got me to have faith in the military again.
Hate is a strong word,
but it's not strong enough to describe you.